My youngest child is now 9 years old. In Grade 4 at school, she is a happy student - loves going to school, has many friends, is doing well academically and enjoys the social aspects greatly.
Since she started in Prep in 2014, she has usually done 1-2 nights a week of after school care. In 2014, with her sisters who were then also at primary school, she went on Monday and Tuesday nights to accommodate my work schedule (I was at that time in a salaried office job). 2015 was a single night (Tuesdays) as I dropped to part time hours at work. In 2016, she only went on an ad hoc basis, as my freelance work needs dictated. In 2017, we booked a regular night each week (Thursdays) which gave me the capacity to have one longer day for meetings and client visits. This year, we started off just continuing the Thursdays, but starting from May, we also added in Tuesdays when I started a new project that requires one office day a week (which is Tuesday).
Unlike her older sisters, who tolerated after care but didn't love it, my 9 year old has always really enjoyed going along. We've been very lucky to have terrific co-ordinators of the after care program across the time that my kids have needed to use it, and the kids get a great mix of free play, activities, and guided games and learning. My youngest is a very social kid and she's really appreciated the extra play time with peers, and the fun of doing different things.
I have spent a lot of time feeling vaguely guilty about after care. Not so much the single night a week - even I, self-flagellator that I am, could not help but see that as an unequivocal good, for both her and my workload. Increasing to two nights caused me a bit of a pang, though, despite her excitement about it.
However, I had a bit of an epiphany last week. I had to travel to Adelaide for work for most of the week, and to accommodate her dad's work needs, she ended up going to after care for 4 of the 5 nights of the week (every day except Monday, when I was still in Melbourne). And guess what? She LOVED it. She was voted Student Leader for the week and had a magnificent time. She did crafts, games, cooking and science experiments. She consolidated friendships with kids she already liked, and met new friends. She had virtually no weekday screen time, and I am sure partly as a result, slept better than her usual wont.
I realised, finally, that I am not abrogating my parental duties by recognising that our week runs better (hers as well as mine) if she goes to after care and I have adequate time to do my work. It means that the time we get together is of much better quality, and more meaningful. We have paused her swimming lessons for 3 months, as we do every winter, so her only extracurricular activity at the moment is ukelele lessons (which she actually does at school, during lunchbreaks), so after care also fills a void very nicely for her in a way that causes zero extra stress for me when co-ordinating my increasingly demanding work schedule.
So we had a chat this morning, she and I, and we've agreed (to her delight) that from next term, she's going to be attending after care 3 days per week. Mondays, which is a fixed work at home day for me, we'll enjoy our walk home together with the dog and our Monday baking tradition. Fridays, I'll attend school assembly and we'll enjoy end-of-week downtime together. The other three days, she'll go to after care and have fun and I'll concentrate on getting full work days in so my life becomes more manageable.
I think this is going to end up being a good decision, for her and for me.
Showing posts with label Self-Employed Working at Home with Kids. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Self-Employed Working at Home with Kids. Show all posts
Monday, June 4, 2018
Sunday, June 3, 2018
Year Three in Business
My third anniversary in business as a freelance policy, strategy and governance consultant will arrive in a couple of weeks' time, so I thought now might be a good opportunity to review The Year That Was and think about the year to come.
As always, let's start with stats. This year, I have:
- Worked for 6 clients - 4 universities, 1 state government agency, and 1 SME. The balance of the work has been roughly 50% University A, 25% University B, 15% state government, and 10% University C and D and the SME together. One of the university projects came online very late in the year (May), and another was very small, while the SME was a one-shot, which is why C and D and SME together were only a small contribution to the total.
- Had 12 weeks completely off - a week apiece in the July and September school holidays, 3 weeks over summer, a week apiece of project pause time in August, September and November respectively, and 4 weeks in April (the entire month) when we travelled to Japan.
- Worked an average of 4 days a week in the 40 weeks I worked (this was unevenly deployed, with a few 10-day-no-break stretches and some weeks with only a couple of working days in them).
- Attended client sites for meetings an average of 1 day a week except in my Monster Quarter, where it was usually 2 days a week.
- Did 3 business trips to Adelaide for a client there who I've been working with since November.
- Had a very uneven spread of work across the year, with Monster Quarter 2 (Sept-Dec) carrying 35% of the overall year's work while Quarter 4 (Apr-June) carried only 15% (this was largely due to the 4 week break in April and a billing cycle that has pushed some payments forward into next financial year). Quarters 1 and 3 carried 22% and 28% respectively.
- Again made use of subcontract labour to deal with overflow work. I have one very reliable subbie now who definitely helps me manage the fluctuations of the workload, and others I can call upon in desperate times, although that is not as successful generally as they don't have the depth of understanding of my work areas.
- Earned 85% of my earnings from 2016-17 (so a drop of 15%). My goal that I set last year was to have a drop of 10% (I knew that losing April, which is usually one of the most lucrative months of the year, meant I would not match, let alone exceed, last year's total), so I did not quite meet this goal, largely due to a quiet stretch in August-September that I hadn't anticipated. Still, my earnings were more than adequate for our needs, and given that I worked 3 less weeks, I can't really complain.
In non-statistical terms, it has been, on balance, a good year, with moments of being less stellar (but what job or work arrangement doesn't have that?) Learning how to effectively service an interstate client has been interesting and rewarding, and all the projects have had their challenging but also engrossing elements. I have had times of great fatigue, but because I work primarily from home, I have been able to calibrate around my health and energy in a way I wouldn't have been able to do in an office environment, so I count myself very fortunate in that regard.
Looking at my goals that I set last year, I did not too badly. My goals were:
- Get within 10% of 2016-17 earnings: As stated earlier, I didn't quite do this, with a 15% drop, but I went close.
- Take 10 weeks off: I actually had 12, but 2 of them weren't by choice!
- Try to expand my client base: I did this, picking up two new university clients with big projects (including my Adelaide client). I now have three large university clients and two more ad hoc / smaller universities, as well as one government agency and one SME. So that goal has worked out well.
For 2018-19, I am in the unusual position of having the first 9 months already sewn up with work. All three of my big university projects will roll on until at least March 2019, with one of them definitely continuing through til June and one other probably doing so. This means that my income projection is a bit more predictable than it usually is, and also that I am relieved of the burden of seeking further work - a part of freelancing I do not overly enjoy. While I could squeeze in other things - and will no doubt try, if the opportunity offers! - I am not in the position of *having* to find more work until at least March next year, and that's really quite nice.
I'll also be taking a more routine / structured approach to my work weeks, with one fixed day a week on campus for one client, further trips to Adelaide for another, and a more systematic allocation of days between the three big client projects, which I hope will both help manage the heavy workload and also help me with the code-switching I have to do between the projects and their different styles. I anticipate some weekend work will be needed in overlapping peak times, but I am trying to keep that to a real minimum.
My goals for 2018-19 in business are:
1. Exceed 2017-18 income by 20%. This effectively means doing 5% better than my best year so far (2016-17) and given my locked-in work, it should be more than achievable, given that I will not be absenting myself for one of the most lucrative periods of the year!
2. Take 6-7 weeks off. I will, as is my wont, take a week apiece in the July, September and Easter school holidays, and I'll take the Christmas and NY weeks over summer. I'll have to see how things are sitting, but if I can, I'll make that summer break 3 weeks instead of 2 (but given the projects' timelines, that may not be feasible). I'd also love to take another week, maybe configured as a couple of 2-3 day stretches, at some point in the back half of this year, while the kids are at school, to give me a chance to do a few time-hungry personal / life admin tasks I have been putting off, and catch up with friends I rarely see.
3. Plan work strategy for the next 5 years. I'll be 45 years old in a couple of weeks. At the moment, freelancing is working well for me, but I need to put some serious thought into whether this how I want to continue to work in the second half of my 40s, and if so, what my business plan might be for sustainable work attraction, delivery and future savings. I do have a tendency to roll on without thinking further ahead than the next 6 months work-wise, which can be an advantage in that it reduces stress of worrying about unknown unknowns, but isn't the best approach when you are trying to work out how to have a productive mid-life in preparation for a hopefully modest-but-not-impoverished old age.
We won't be taking any big trips in this coming financial year - we've got a nice little 5-day mini-break in the Mallee lined up for September, and will probably do a few days or a week somewhere local next Easter hols too - so that does make work planning easier in a lot of ways. We are, however, thinking of doing an overseas trip in 2019-2020, possibly to either Hawaii or New Zealand, so next year's planning will look a little different! But for now, onwards and upwards into the new financial year.
As always, let's start with stats. This year, I have:
- Worked for 6 clients - 4 universities, 1 state government agency, and 1 SME. The balance of the work has been roughly 50% University A, 25% University B, 15% state government, and 10% University C and D and the SME together. One of the university projects came online very late in the year (May), and another was very small, while the SME was a one-shot, which is why C and D and SME together were only a small contribution to the total.
- Had 12 weeks completely off - a week apiece in the July and September school holidays, 3 weeks over summer, a week apiece of project pause time in August, September and November respectively, and 4 weeks in April (the entire month) when we travelled to Japan.
- Worked an average of 4 days a week in the 40 weeks I worked (this was unevenly deployed, with a few 10-day-no-break stretches and some weeks with only a couple of working days in them).
- Attended client sites for meetings an average of 1 day a week except in my Monster Quarter, where it was usually 2 days a week.
- Did 3 business trips to Adelaide for a client there who I've been working with since November.
- Had a very uneven spread of work across the year, with Monster Quarter 2 (Sept-Dec) carrying 35% of the overall year's work while Quarter 4 (Apr-June) carried only 15% (this was largely due to the 4 week break in April and a billing cycle that has pushed some payments forward into next financial year). Quarters 1 and 3 carried 22% and 28% respectively.
- Again made use of subcontract labour to deal with overflow work. I have one very reliable subbie now who definitely helps me manage the fluctuations of the workload, and others I can call upon in desperate times, although that is not as successful generally as they don't have the depth of understanding of my work areas.
- Earned 85% of my earnings from 2016-17 (so a drop of 15%). My goal that I set last year was to have a drop of 10% (I knew that losing April, which is usually one of the most lucrative months of the year, meant I would not match, let alone exceed, last year's total), so I did not quite meet this goal, largely due to a quiet stretch in August-September that I hadn't anticipated. Still, my earnings were more than adequate for our needs, and given that I worked 3 less weeks, I can't really complain.
In non-statistical terms, it has been, on balance, a good year, with moments of being less stellar (but what job or work arrangement doesn't have that?) Learning how to effectively service an interstate client has been interesting and rewarding, and all the projects have had their challenging but also engrossing elements. I have had times of great fatigue, but because I work primarily from home, I have been able to calibrate around my health and energy in a way I wouldn't have been able to do in an office environment, so I count myself very fortunate in that regard.
Looking at my goals that I set last year, I did not too badly. My goals were:
- Get within 10% of 2016-17 earnings: As stated earlier, I didn't quite do this, with a 15% drop, but I went close.
- Take 10 weeks off: I actually had 12, but 2 of them weren't by choice!
- Try to expand my client base: I did this, picking up two new university clients with big projects (including my Adelaide client). I now have three large university clients and two more ad hoc / smaller universities, as well as one government agency and one SME. So that goal has worked out well.
For 2018-19, I am in the unusual position of having the first 9 months already sewn up with work. All three of my big university projects will roll on until at least March 2019, with one of them definitely continuing through til June and one other probably doing so. This means that my income projection is a bit more predictable than it usually is, and also that I am relieved of the burden of seeking further work - a part of freelancing I do not overly enjoy. While I could squeeze in other things - and will no doubt try, if the opportunity offers! - I am not in the position of *having* to find more work until at least March next year, and that's really quite nice.
I'll also be taking a more routine / structured approach to my work weeks, with one fixed day a week on campus for one client, further trips to Adelaide for another, and a more systematic allocation of days between the three big client projects, which I hope will both help manage the heavy workload and also help me with the code-switching I have to do between the projects and their different styles. I anticipate some weekend work will be needed in overlapping peak times, but I am trying to keep that to a real minimum.
My goals for 2018-19 in business are:
1. Exceed 2017-18 income by 20%. This effectively means doing 5% better than my best year so far (2016-17) and given my locked-in work, it should be more than achievable, given that I will not be absenting myself for one of the most lucrative periods of the year!
2. Take 6-7 weeks off. I will, as is my wont, take a week apiece in the July, September and Easter school holidays, and I'll take the Christmas and NY weeks over summer. I'll have to see how things are sitting, but if I can, I'll make that summer break 3 weeks instead of 2 (but given the projects' timelines, that may not be feasible). I'd also love to take another week, maybe configured as a couple of 2-3 day stretches, at some point in the back half of this year, while the kids are at school, to give me a chance to do a few time-hungry personal / life admin tasks I have been putting off, and catch up with friends I rarely see.
3. Plan work strategy for the next 5 years. I'll be 45 years old in a couple of weeks. At the moment, freelancing is working well for me, but I need to put some serious thought into whether this how I want to continue to work in the second half of my 40s, and if so, what my business plan might be for sustainable work attraction, delivery and future savings. I do have a tendency to roll on without thinking further ahead than the next 6 months work-wise, which can be an advantage in that it reduces stress of worrying about unknown unknowns, but isn't the best approach when you are trying to work out how to have a productive mid-life in preparation for a hopefully modest-but-not-impoverished old age.
We won't be taking any big trips in this coming financial year - we've got a nice little 5-day mini-break in the Mallee lined up for September, and will probably do a few days or a week somewhere local next Easter hols too - so that does make work planning easier in a lot of ways. We are, however, thinking of doing an overseas trip in 2019-2020, possibly to either Hawaii or New Zealand, so next year's planning will look a little different! But for now, onwards and upwards into the new financial year.
Monday, January 22, 2018
This month in review, this quarter in view
Last year, for a few months, I was doing review / in view posts here. I started off doing them weekly in March, then later dropped to fortnightly and then 4-weekly, before abandoning them altogether in November as end-of-year shenanigans took hold.
I did find them a useful, albeit unsustainable, exercise for most of the time I was doing them. It helped me to get a bit of perspective on my life and activities balance, and gave me a bit of a boost in weeks that I felt I wasn't achieving anything (counting your tasks can have the same effect as counting your blessings in that regard!) I plan to sporadically do a similar thing this year, but I'm not going to commit to a particular schedule, as that gets a bit difficult to sustain.
As the New Year is no longer brand-spanking new, though, I thought I'd do a little overview of how our summer has gone so far (I date "summer" for this purpose as being from Boxing Day onwards) and the big-ticket items coming up between now and the end of term one (Good Friday).
The summer has been quite a good one. It has not been the height of excitement or indeed relaxation (we haven't gone away anywhere big, although we have done day trips and fun things) and I have been back working from home since 8 January, so that has not been completely challenge-free, but it has still been a positive month overall.
This first term looks frankly monstrous with work commitment levels, but I am hoping to get through it intact. I am trying very hard to plan for a scaling down from term two onwards, to recalibrate my business commitments in the second half of the year to be never more than 4, and preferably 3 - 3.5, days a week (rather than the 5-6 I could easily fill now - only having the kids home, and one unexpected migraine that kicked out most of a planned work day, has stopped me working full weeks since 8 January). This will partly be achievable by developing more formal subcontracting relationships and really using others' expertise.
As indicated below, despite how busy I am, I am also going to take two Mental Health Days during this term on weekdays where I can have 6.5 hours while the kids are at school to do something relaxing and recharging. I will probably use one of those days for doing a bunch of mildly enjoyable but also necessary non-work things like getting my hair cut and going gift / party shopping - this one I'll locate close to my 9-year-old's birthday party in late Feb, so I can make sure I have enough unstressy time to get everything I need for that. The other day, not sure, see what I feel like when I get there!
So we'll see. The nature of my work is such that things really can change on a dime, so my projections below might end up needing adjustment. This is the putative plan though, for now.
- Weekly ice-skating visits for 12-year-old and some combination of friends and family
- Several swimming-related excursions (beach / pool)
- Day trip to Hanging Rock (that was magnificent)
- Visit to the Triennial exhibition at the NGV (also magnificent)
- 2 x movie trips (a split one where some of us saw Ferdinand, some of us saw Wonder, and one of us saw The Greatest Showman; and a me-and-kids-and-their-friends trip to Jumanji)
- A two-night holiday at grandparents for the kids
- Dinner out to Hellenic Hotel for husband and I (while kids were away!)
- Much Ado About Nothing at the Pop Up Globe for me with a friend
- So far, 7 days of paid work for me (4 in week of 8 Jan, 3 last week), with an anticipated 3.5 days this week to round off the month
- Finalisation of Japan trip plans and payments
- Participating in Month of Poetry challenge - haven't missed a day yet!
I did find them a useful, albeit unsustainable, exercise for most of the time I was doing them. It helped me to get a bit of perspective on my life and activities balance, and gave me a bit of a boost in weeks that I felt I wasn't achieving anything (counting your tasks can have the same effect as counting your blessings in that regard!) I plan to sporadically do a similar thing this year, but I'm not going to commit to a particular schedule, as that gets a bit difficult to sustain.
As the New Year is no longer brand-spanking new, though, I thought I'd do a little overview of how our summer has gone so far (I date "summer" for this purpose as being from Boxing Day onwards) and the big-ticket items coming up between now and the end of term one (Good Friday).
The summer has been quite a good one. It has not been the height of excitement or indeed relaxation (we haven't gone away anywhere big, although we have done day trips and fun things) and I have been back working from home since 8 January, so that has not been completely challenge-free, but it has still been a positive month overall.
This first term looks frankly monstrous with work commitment levels, but I am hoping to get through it intact. I am trying very hard to plan for a scaling down from term two onwards, to recalibrate my business commitments in the second half of the year to be never more than 4, and preferably 3 - 3.5, days a week (rather than the 5-6 I could easily fill now - only having the kids home, and one unexpected migraine that kicked out most of a planned work day, has stopped me working full weeks since 8 January). This will partly be achievable by developing more formal subcontracting relationships and really using others' expertise.
As indicated below, despite how busy I am, I am also going to take two Mental Health Days during this term on weekdays where I can have 6.5 hours while the kids are at school to do something relaxing and recharging. I will probably use one of those days for doing a bunch of mildly enjoyable but also necessary non-work things like getting my hair cut and going gift / party shopping - this one I'll locate close to my 9-year-old's birthday party in late Feb, so I can make sure I have enough unstressy time to get everything I need for that. The other day, not sure, see what I feel like when I get there!
So we'll see. The nature of my work is such that things really can change on a dime, so my projections below might end up needing adjustment. This is the putative plan though, for now.
Summer in Review
- Multiple friend sleepovers, hang-outs and playdates for all three kids- Weekly ice-skating visits for 12-year-old and some combination of friends and family
- Several swimming-related excursions (beach / pool)
- Day trip to Hanging Rock (that was magnificent)
- Visit to the Triennial exhibition at the NGV (also magnificent)
- 2 x movie trips (a split one where some of us saw Ferdinand, some of us saw Wonder, and one of us saw The Greatest Showman; and a me-and-kids-and-their-friends trip to Jumanji)
- A two-night holiday at grandparents for the kids
- Dinner out to Hellenic Hotel for husband and I (while kids were away!)
- Much Ado About Nothing at the Pop Up Globe for me with a friend
- So far, 7 days of paid work for me (4 in week of 8 Jan, 3 last week), with an anticipated 3.5 days this week to round off the month
- Finalisation of Japan trip plans and payments
- Participating in Month of Poetry challenge - haven't missed a day yet!
Term in View (from now til Good Friday)
- Kids back to school and school routines from 29/1 (primary schooler) and 2/2 (high schoolers)
- Return to weekly gymnastics, swimming, jujitsu and skating classes: Two key differences will be the extended length gymnastics class for almost-9 year old , which will add one pressure, and the 14-year-old self-commuting to jujitsu, which will relieve one pressure (although we will still be picking her up at the end)
- Average of 5 days booked work per week over 4 client projects for me, with at least one, and probably two, interstate trips to clients
- Preparations for our overseas trip (!)
- Plan for two Mental Health Days across the course of the term (dates TBC)
- Special events: youngest's 9th birthday and party (late Feb), Roger Waters concert and overnight hotel stay (me and hubs), Evanescence concert (14 year old and her dad), husband's birthday, friends' second wedding
Thursday, March 9, 2017
Mental Health Days
Last Tuesday, I gave myself a Mental Health Day off from my regularly scheduled life. I decided on the Sunday that I would take a day out to go dress shopping, go see a movie, and generally pootle about NOT working, NOT doing housework or chores, and NOT doing family stuff. Just for the 6.5 hours the kids were at school, I thought, I'll have a little break. February was a very challenging month, and I felt like I needed it.
Well, my plan was almost derailed - typically - by a sick kid, as I had to go fetch my 8 year old home from school at lunchtime on Monday. I was resigned to losing my MH day, but miraculously, she woke up alright on the Tuesday and went to school (she got sick again that night and ended up being home Weds-Thurs, so this was literally the only day I could've done this).
I went to a shopping centre, drank fancy hot chocolate, looked at dresses, and took myself to a session of "Hidden Figures" (which I absolutely loved). The whole time, I felt slightly guilty but not very much. I really, really needed the time out, and I'm sure it did me good. I went back to my work and caring duties on the Wednesday very refreshed.
So, with this in mind, I've decided I'm going to schedule myself another Mental Health Day before term one holidays start at the end of March ... but this time I am NOT announcing a date for it, EVEN IN MY OWN MIND, so the universe has less prospect of messing with me! I'll just play it by ear and seize the day when the moment is right.
I mean, I'm much luckier than most - I take at least half, and sometimes all, of every second Wednesday off to have time with my partner (we do brunch or lunch, and occasionally catch a show); and I usually knock off for the week by 2:30pm on Fridays so I can ease into the weekend with the kids. Sometimes, too, I take a whole day out from work to stack appointments for me and the kids if I need to (it IS possible to do passport photos, haircuts, dentist, physio, PT, doctor and kids' extracurricular classes x 2 all in one day - ask me how I know!) Although multiple-appointment days are hardly relaxing, the fact that I can do them without finagling leave from work is a great boon, and I am very aware of that.
That said, taking a weekday once a month-ish to do no work, no housework, and no running around is a different level of great. And I just thought to myself - well, why shouldn't I? I've accepted all the risks of freelancing, some of which bite quite hard (the uncertainty of income thing is a huge one); why shouldn't I occasionally get some personal, rather than familial, benefit from the way I work?
Call it a self-employment perk, or a self-indulgence even, if you like; but as long as I'm able to, I'm going to have a 4- to 6-weekly Mental Health Day.
Well, my plan was almost derailed - typically - by a sick kid, as I had to go fetch my 8 year old home from school at lunchtime on Monday. I was resigned to losing my MH day, but miraculously, she woke up alright on the Tuesday and went to school (she got sick again that night and ended up being home Weds-Thurs, so this was literally the only day I could've done this).
I went to a shopping centre, drank fancy hot chocolate, looked at dresses, and took myself to a session of "Hidden Figures" (which I absolutely loved). The whole time, I felt slightly guilty but not very much. I really, really needed the time out, and I'm sure it did me good. I went back to my work and caring duties on the Wednesday very refreshed.
So, with this in mind, I've decided I'm going to schedule myself another Mental Health Day before term one holidays start at the end of March ... but this time I am NOT announcing a date for it, EVEN IN MY OWN MIND, so the universe has less prospect of messing with me! I'll just play it by ear and seize the day when the moment is right.
I mean, I'm much luckier than most - I take at least half, and sometimes all, of every second Wednesday off to have time with my partner (we do brunch or lunch, and occasionally catch a show); and I usually knock off for the week by 2:30pm on Fridays so I can ease into the weekend with the kids. Sometimes, too, I take a whole day out from work to stack appointments for me and the kids if I need to (it IS possible to do passport photos, haircuts, dentist, physio, PT, doctor and kids' extracurricular classes x 2 all in one day - ask me how I know!) Although multiple-appointment days are hardly relaxing, the fact that I can do them without finagling leave from work is a great boon, and I am very aware of that.
That said, taking a weekday once a month-ish to do no work, no housework, and no running around is a different level of great. And I just thought to myself - well, why shouldn't I? I've accepted all the risks of freelancing, some of which bite quite hard (the uncertainty of income thing is a huge one); why shouldn't I occasionally get some personal, rather than familial, benefit from the way I work?
Call it a self-employment perk, or a self-indulgence even, if you like; but as long as I'm able to, I'm going to have a 4- to 6-weekly Mental Health Day.
Wednesday, February 8, 2017
Naming the thing
The other day, I was discussing work with a friend I haven't seen for a while.
"So you don't work for the university anymore?" she said.
"Well..." I said. "I sort of do, but I'm not employed there though. They're one of my big clients."
She looked a bit confused. "So you're a - what?"
I hemmed and hawed and finally came down on the side of telling her that I was a consultant, which felt really pretentious to be honest, but I realised later probably didn't answer her real question, which was: how do I get paid?
(Insert freelancer joke here along the lines of "infrequently and with difficulty lol")
It strikes me that many, if not most, employees have a bit of muddly thinking going on when it comes to the 30% of us who work but aren't on some organisation's payroll. We of the Quarterly Tax Nightmare, let's say. I have had great difficulty explaining what it is I do, and how I do it, to other people at times.
I have finally come up with this taxonomy that I think works. It goes like this:
Do I get paid a wage or salary, and does someone else deal with the tax office and pay super on my behalf?
YES - Employee
NO - Not employee but could be a few other things
Do I get paid for my work on invoices issued to clients or customers, and do I have more than one client or customer?
YES - Independent contractor OR contract business OR freelancer
NO - If I issue invoices but have only one client - Subcontractor
Do I employ other people?
YES - Business
NO - Might still be a small business, but see below
Do I sell stuff (eg goods) rather than just my labour?
YES - Small business
NO - Might still be a small business, but see below
Do I have an ACN as well as an ABN, and / or do I regularly use subcontracted labour?
YES - Small business operator
NO - Sole Trader
Do I have increasing anxiety as each quarter ends, culminating in a mini meltdown when the bloody BAS is due again?
YES - Oh yeah, you're a freelancer / sole trader / small business operator
NO - Lucky old (employed) you!
So my answer to my friend should probably have been that I am a Policy Consultant (that's my job title) operating as a sole trader but moving towards being a small business (that's my mode of getting paid). I use subcontractors a little and it will probably grow this year, so I am in a transitional phase, I guess.
I'm also a person who works at home for about 70% of the time I bill, which brings me into the ambit of a whole 'nuther array of memes and conventions - working from home is not the same as working in an office (I personally find it blissful, but it sure isn't for everyone). It involves a rethinking of yoir approach to time management and organisation that can be tragically ill-advised for many, at least at first, but there is no denying the benefits if you get it right.
So then: I'm a WAH Policy Consultant, Sole Trader, reasonable rates, by request, at your service :-P
"So you don't work for the university anymore?" she said.
"Well..." I said. "I sort of do, but I'm not employed there though. They're one of my big clients."
She looked a bit confused. "So you're a - what?"
I hemmed and hawed and finally came down on the side of telling her that I was a consultant, which felt really pretentious to be honest, but I realised later probably didn't answer her real question, which was: how do I get paid?
(Insert freelancer joke here along the lines of "infrequently and with difficulty lol")
It strikes me that many, if not most, employees have a bit of muddly thinking going on when it comes to the 30% of us who work but aren't on some organisation's payroll. We of the Quarterly Tax Nightmare, let's say. I have had great difficulty explaining what it is I do, and how I do it, to other people at times.
I have finally come up with this taxonomy that I think works. It goes like this:
Do I get paid a wage or salary, and does someone else deal with the tax office and pay super on my behalf?
YES - Employee
NO - Not employee but could be a few other things
Do I get paid for my work on invoices issued to clients or customers, and do I have more than one client or customer?
YES - Independent contractor OR contract business OR freelancer
NO - If I issue invoices but have only one client - Subcontractor
Do I employ other people?
YES - Business
NO - Might still be a small business, but see below
Do I sell stuff (eg goods) rather than just my labour?
YES - Small business
NO - Might still be a small business, but see below
Do I have an ACN as well as an ABN, and / or do I regularly use subcontracted labour?
YES - Small business operator
NO - Sole Trader
Do I have increasing anxiety as each quarter ends, culminating in a mini meltdown when the bloody BAS is due again?
YES - Oh yeah, you're a freelancer / sole trader / small business operator
NO - Lucky old (employed) you!
So my answer to my friend should probably have been that I am a Policy Consultant (that's my job title) operating as a sole trader but moving towards being a small business (that's my mode of getting paid). I use subcontractors a little and it will probably grow this year, so I am in a transitional phase, I guess.
I'm also a person who works at home for about 70% of the time I bill, which brings me into the ambit of a whole 'nuther array of memes and conventions - working from home is not the same as working in an office (I personally find it blissful, but it sure isn't for everyone). It involves a rethinking of yoir approach to time management and organisation that can be tragically ill-advised for many, at least at first, but there is no denying the benefits if you get it right.
So then: I'm a WAH Policy Consultant, Sole Trader, reasonable rates, by request, at your service :-P
Friday, August 12, 2016
Transitions and disjunctions
I'm in a transitional stage with work projects at the moment.
The nature of my business is that I work with anywhere from one to four clients at a time, on projects that can be done partially or wholly at home (different projects require different levels of site attendance). Generally, I work on independent contractor agreements tied to the specific project (although one regular client now has me on an open-ended agreement where new projects can be added upon mutual consent).
Although my projects can, and do, vary in length and complexity, it's typical for me to work on any given project for at least 3 months, and usually more like 6-9 months. In 2016, this has meant that I have been with one client on Project A since last November; I've been with a second client on Project B since February; and client three, with Project C, started in early March.
Although there have been a couple of small one-off projects come and go in this time, it has meant that the vast preponderance of my work has been stable for the past almost 6 months. Yes, there has been substantial variation across weeks as to which project has got the most time and attention, as needs have dictated (that said, Project A is the uncontested front-runner in terms of hours overall). However, even within this variation, there has been the opportunity to strike up a rhythm and a norming of my work pattern. I've got to know the projects, the organisational staff, the expectations, the systems, and the objectives really well. I've gotten pretty comfortable, truth be told.
Well, over the past month (and in the month to come), things are going to be turned on their heads. Project A, while still ongoing, has geared down from being routinely 3 days a week to being about 1 day a week, as it cycles into its close-out phase. Project B has concluded - I delivered the final presentation and report, and sent the final invoice, this very morning, in fact. (An aside, but I was really happy with my work on Project B - I did my best and I was proud of the result. The client liked it too, which what matters the most!) Project C, due to staffing changes at the organisation involved, has disappeared into radio silence over the past fortnight, and I suspect will remain fallow for some time to come while they sort themselves out.
While all this is happening, I've been fortunate enough to secure a new project (let's call it ... Project D!) with the same organisation as Project A, but a different division and new people. Project D kicks off properly next week and will occupy as much time as I'm free to sell them until early October, then pause for a month, then back on to 2-3 days a week til Christmas. Simultaneously, I am negotiating with a new client for a Project E (that may or may not come to pass because Reasons, but it's something to be factored in). To ice the cake, the client from just-closed Project B would like me to do a smaller follow-up project (Project F, although let's hope not :-) in the October - December period.
What this means for me is that I am in a heavily transitional period in my work life. I'm in the set-up, get-a-handle-on-it, build-relationships phase with two new teams, and one new organisation, and the comfy old shoes of the people I've come to enjoy working with are no longer available to slip on each morning. (That's why I'm treasuring my remaining one day a week with the good folks at Project A - security blankie for sure!)
It's quite tiring, this phase - especially just coming off flu, as I am - although it's also quite exciting in its way. The lure of the fresh and new is real, as is the usual performance anxiety about whether or not I will be able to satisfy the expectations of the new projects. All in all, work occupies much more of my headspace at these times of change than when I am mid-project, and that's something to be aware of, and careful with, when it comes to maintaining balance and wellbeing.
Still, there's no denying it - having work sewn up through til Christmas is a very good thing, and I'm grateful. I know for sure now that I'll be OK to pay for things like two lots of high school fees in 2017 and house repair expenses we have coming up. That is awfully reassuring at the end of the day.
The nature of my business is that I work with anywhere from one to four clients at a time, on projects that can be done partially or wholly at home (different projects require different levels of site attendance). Generally, I work on independent contractor agreements tied to the specific project (although one regular client now has me on an open-ended agreement where new projects can be added upon mutual consent).
Although my projects can, and do, vary in length and complexity, it's typical for me to work on any given project for at least 3 months, and usually more like 6-9 months. In 2016, this has meant that I have been with one client on Project A since last November; I've been with a second client on Project B since February; and client three, with Project C, started in early March.
Although there have been a couple of small one-off projects come and go in this time, it has meant that the vast preponderance of my work has been stable for the past almost 6 months. Yes, there has been substantial variation across weeks as to which project has got the most time and attention, as needs have dictated (that said, Project A is the uncontested front-runner in terms of hours overall). However, even within this variation, there has been the opportunity to strike up a rhythm and a norming of my work pattern. I've got to know the projects, the organisational staff, the expectations, the systems, and the objectives really well. I've gotten pretty comfortable, truth be told.
Well, over the past month (and in the month to come), things are going to be turned on their heads. Project A, while still ongoing, has geared down from being routinely 3 days a week to being about 1 day a week, as it cycles into its close-out phase. Project B has concluded - I delivered the final presentation and report, and sent the final invoice, this very morning, in fact. (An aside, but I was really happy with my work on Project B - I did my best and I was proud of the result. The client liked it too, which what matters the most!) Project C, due to staffing changes at the organisation involved, has disappeared into radio silence over the past fortnight, and I suspect will remain fallow for some time to come while they sort themselves out.
While all this is happening, I've been fortunate enough to secure a new project (let's call it ... Project D!) with the same organisation as Project A, but a different division and new people. Project D kicks off properly next week and will occupy as much time as I'm free to sell them until early October, then pause for a month, then back on to 2-3 days a week til Christmas. Simultaneously, I am negotiating with a new client for a Project E (that may or may not come to pass because Reasons, but it's something to be factored in). To ice the cake, the client from just-closed Project B would like me to do a smaller follow-up project (Project F, although let's hope not :-) in the October - December period.
What this means for me is that I am in a heavily transitional period in my work life. I'm in the set-up, get-a-handle-on-it, build-relationships phase with two new teams, and one new organisation, and the comfy old shoes of the people I've come to enjoy working with are no longer available to slip on each morning. (That's why I'm treasuring my remaining one day a week with the good folks at Project A - security blankie for sure!)
It's quite tiring, this phase - especially just coming off flu, as I am - although it's also quite exciting in its way. The lure of the fresh and new is real, as is the usual performance anxiety about whether or not I will be able to satisfy the expectations of the new projects. All in all, work occupies much more of my headspace at these times of change than when I am mid-project, and that's something to be aware of, and careful with, when it comes to maintaining balance and wellbeing.
Still, there's no denying it - having work sewn up through til Christmas is a very good thing, and I'm grateful. I know for sure now that I'll be OK to pay for things like two lots of high school fees in 2017 and house repair expenses we have coming up. That is awfully reassuring at the end of the day.
Saturday, March 26, 2016
Term One: Done
So, term one 2016 concluded on Thursday afternoon. For us, picking my eldest up from school following her year 7 camp (at 3:15) was the transitional moment, after which we pottered home to enter an intensive 36-hour hibernation, which has involved reading, watching TV, playing games (both computer and card / board games) and lying around. The kids and I have yet to leave our property since unlocking the door at 3:30pm Thursday, and the two elder kids are yet to leave the *house*. (The youngest did play in the yard for a while yesterday, as my husband and I did some laundry-hanging and gardening).
It was a massive, massive term. My eldest daughter started high school, with all that entailed in terms of adjustment to routine, new commitments (including not insubstantial financial commitments), and letting go. My secondborn found her groove in Grade 6, running a Lost Dogs' Home fundraiser and displaying substantial leadership skills, and also suffered from an ongoing digestive complaint that has finally resolved in us moving her to a gluten-free diet (which does seem to be working). My little one had a good entry to Grade 2, although was upset and shaken by one of her closest friends leaving the school to move to Indonesia with her family.
We had birthdays (both in our family and multiple friends' celebrations), chess, netball, swimming, and music. My husband took up bike riding to add to his distance walking. Husband and I had a wedding anniversary day in the city.
For me, this term has been by far my busiest stretch with my freelance work since I returned to freelancing last June. In the 8.5 weeks it encompassed, I have billed more time than in the 4.5 preceding months, which is great financially, but has not been cost-free in health and family terms. I now have four projects live, with a fifth pending, although the longest-term of these projects (which commenced last November) is gearing down as it approaches its final stage. I will be just as busy for the first half of term two, with Projects A and B continuing until the end of May, and Project D (a smaller editing job) taking place entirely in April. Project C will still be rolling on after May until mid-July, and my pending project may kick in anytime from early May onwards, but I am still hopeful that life will be a little less frantic in work terms after A and B are signed off and handed over, and little D is done.
I have also been fitting in quite a bit of writing, mostly poetry, and am excited to be part of a planned anthology of poetry from my Month of Poetry writing group. It's a long road ahead to publication (we're hoping for January 2017), but we have a tentative title: Limina. I am not-so-secretly tickled at the idea of having some of my poems published.
My health has been reasonable, but with some hiccups. I have had some crashing fatigue issues again and some internal concerns, which have led to my specialist starting me on a test dose of thyroxine (damn you, Hashimoto's Disease!) and scheduling me for an exploratory & maintenance surgical procedure in April. I am not overly thrilled to be needing an operation, but it is minor, and hopefully it will resolve some of the persistent niggling issues that drag me down. (Of course, right now I have a stinking cold, which jaundices me on the whole subject of health and wellbeing, but infection with the common cold is hardly a sign of the coming Apocalypse, even for my over-heated imagination!)
We also have been chipping away at home maintenance tasks - the biggest of these being the replacement of our manky old side fence with a new super-high colourbond structure that we have dubbed the Great Wall of Suburbia. (It's over 8ft high). The neighbours wanted the extra height and I was happy to go along, as I felt like it would be a good thing to help block some of the noise from their occasional night-time shenanigans, and so far so good on that front. The back fence is next in the crosshairs, but will probably not be done until spring due to financial factors for the back neighbours (and I don't want to push, I know how tough it can be).
The kids and husband are on holidays now until term two commences on 11 April. I had hoped to be too, but in fact I have a couple of things I need to finish for various projects before I can down tools. Yesterday I did not touch any work, but I will try to get it squared away by Monday night so I can enjoy a good break with my family. On Tuesday night I am taking my youngest to stay at a fancy hotel in the city and then on Wednesday we are going to see Matilda, which we are both looking forward to immensely, and I definitely want to have purged work from my headspace by then.
Ambitions for term two? I think I'll settle for holding the line - keeping everyone reasonably healthy and functional, discharging all our obligations as well as we can, and keeping on writing. I am hoping that my surgery goes smoothly and that the thyroxine helps stabilise my energy levels. I want to make sure I carve out time for family things, regardless of how busy I am with work. And I hope to arrive at the winter school holidays in a good state to enjoy the next term break.
It was a massive, massive term. My eldest daughter started high school, with all that entailed in terms of adjustment to routine, new commitments (including not insubstantial financial commitments), and letting go. My secondborn found her groove in Grade 6, running a Lost Dogs' Home fundraiser and displaying substantial leadership skills, and also suffered from an ongoing digestive complaint that has finally resolved in us moving her to a gluten-free diet (which does seem to be working). My little one had a good entry to Grade 2, although was upset and shaken by one of her closest friends leaving the school to move to Indonesia with her family.
We had birthdays (both in our family and multiple friends' celebrations), chess, netball, swimming, and music. My husband took up bike riding to add to his distance walking. Husband and I had a wedding anniversary day in the city.
For me, this term has been by far my busiest stretch with my freelance work since I returned to freelancing last June. In the 8.5 weeks it encompassed, I have billed more time than in the 4.5 preceding months, which is great financially, but has not been cost-free in health and family terms. I now have four projects live, with a fifth pending, although the longest-term of these projects (which commenced last November) is gearing down as it approaches its final stage. I will be just as busy for the first half of term two, with Projects A and B continuing until the end of May, and Project D (a smaller editing job) taking place entirely in April. Project C will still be rolling on after May until mid-July, and my pending project may kick in anytime from early May onwards, but I am still hopeful that life will be a little less frantic in work terms after A and B are signed off and handed over, and little D is done.
I have also been fitting in quite a bit of writing, mostly poetry, and am excited to be part of a planned anthology of poetry from my Month of Poetry writing group. It's a long road ahead to publication (we're hoping for January 2017), but we have a tentative title: Limina. I am not-so-secretly tickled at the idea of having some of my poems published.
My health has been reasonable, but with some hiccups. I have had some crashing fatigue issues again and some internal concerns, which have led to my specialist starting me on a test dose of thyroxine (damn you, Hashimoto's Disease!) and scheduling me for an exploratory & maintenance surgical procedure in April. I am not overly thrilled to be needing an operation, but it is minor, and hopefully it will resolve some of the persistent niggling issues that drag me down. (Of course, right now I have a stinking cold, which jaundices me on the whole subject of health and wellbeing, but infection with the common cold is hardly a sign of the coming Apocalypse, even for my over-heated imagination!)
We also have been chipping away at home maintenance tasks - the biggest of these being the replacement of our manky old side fence with a new super-high colourbond structure that we have dubbed the Great Wall of Suburbia. (It's over 8ft high). The neighbours wanted the extra height and I was happy to go along, as I felt like it would be a good thing to help block some of the noise from their occasional night-time shenanigans, and so far so good on that front. The back fence is next in the crosshairs, but will probably not be done until spring due to financial factors for the back neighbours (and I don't want to push, I know how tough it can be).
The kids and husband are on holidays now until term two commences on 11 April. I had hoped to be too, but in fact I have a couple of things I need to finish for various projects before I can down tools. Yesterday I did not touch any work, but I will try to get it squared away by Monday night so I can enjoy a good break with my family. On Tuesday night I am taking my youngest to stay at a fancy hotel in the city and then on Wednesday we are going to see Matilda, which we are both looking forward to immensely, and I definitely want to have purged work from my headspace by then.
Ambitions for term two? I think I'll settle for holding the line - keeping everyone reasonably healthy and functional, discharging all our obligations as well as we can, and keeping on writing. I am hoping that my surgery goes smoothly and that the thyroxine helps stabilise my energy levels. I want to make sure I carve out time for family things, regardless of how busy I am with work. And I hope to arrive at the winter school holidays in a good state to enjoy the next term break.
Tuesday, March 1, 2016
A day in the life of a freelancer
I read with some amusement the Guardian's Secret Office Worker column when it gets published. I rather enjoyed this darkly funny portrait by five office workers - a Project Manager, a charity worker, a PR writer, a magazine editor, and a tech director - of their days at work.
It's been quite a while since I did A Day in the Life, so I thought, now that I am established back in my contracting / freelancing life, it would be a good time to have a look at it. Here is my day yesterday, at a time when I have three projects for three different clients (A, B and C) in progress.
7am Get up, get children up.
Do the whole breakfast / school lunch / finding clothing / hair & tooth brushing dance.
8am Husband and eldest leave house for school and work. Time to chivvy younger two along.
8:35am Take youngest to primary school. Middle child rides her bike and meets us there.
8:45am Home. Kettle on, set load of washing going while computer boots.
9am Drink morning cuppa while reading & responding to work email / flicking over online news.
9:30am Commence work on project plan for Project B. Spend time gathering data and formulating
the always-tricky purpose statements.
11:30am Phone meeting with Client B to discuss scope questions with their project.
12pm Lunch break - hang wet washing, do dishes, and eat.
12:30pm Back to the project plan - two more sections completed and two follow-up emails sent.
2pm New content to review arrives for Project A. Read through it and formulate / send email
questions for clarification on several points.
3pm Go to collect younger children from school. Once home, facilitate snacking needs.
4pm Off to the doctors with all three kids (two of whom need medical attention).
5pm Home from doctors. Swing directly into making dinner.
6pm Dinner done. Kids read / watch TV while I spend an hour on reviewing the first third of
the material for Project A.
7pm Swing into showering / bedtime stories / bedtime routines.
While this is occurring, wash dishes.
8:30pm Another hour on the Project A document review.
9:30pm Computer off; to bed to read and fall asleep.
My days, of which this is fairly typical, tend to be an ebb and flow of work and family duties. I usually do between 6 and 9 hours work on any given day (yesterday it was 7 hours, which is well within my norm), but a relatively small percentage of this is meetings, which is very good, and I rarely do paid work between school pick-up and dinner, which is taken up with family matters.
I don't work all my hours within the standard work day, and I don't work extreme chunks of time - a two-hour block is usually the maximum I'll do without interspersion of some other activity, which suits me (I find I am really losing focus by the 2-hour mark anyway).
Some days are more crowded than others, but what I tend not to have is much truly "dead" time - if I have hit a wall with one project or client, I switch over to another or to a household or writing activity, because there is no value in simply warming a seat while I wait for things to ungum or answers to arrive.
Freelancing from my home suits me much better than being in an office. I know now that it does. Assuming I can keep getting a reasonable flow of work, I think this is what I'll be doing for the medium- to long-term.
It's been quite a while since I did A Day in the Life, so I thought, now that I am established back in my contracting / freelancing life, it would be a good time to have a look at it. Here is my day yesterday, at a time when I have three projects for three different clients (A, B and C) in progress.
7am Get up, get children up.
Do the whole breakfast / school lunch / finding clothing / hair & tooth brushing dance.
8am Husband and eldest leave house for school and work. Time to chivvy younger two along.
8:35am Take youngest to primary school. Middle child rides her bike and meets us there.
8:45am Home. Kettle on, set load of washing going while computer boots.
9am Drink morning cuppa while reading & responding to work email / flicking over online news.
9:30am Commence work on project plan for Project B. Spend time gathering data and formulating
the always-tricky purpose statements.
11:30am Phone meeting with Client B to discuss scope questions with their project.
12pm Lunch break - hang wet washing, do dishes, and eat.
12:30pm Back to the project plan - two more sections completed and two follow-up emails sent.
2pm New content to review arrives for Project A. Read through it and formulate / send email
questions for clarification on several points.
3pm Go to collect younger children from school. Once home, facilitate snacking needs.
4pm Off to the doctors with all three kids (two of whom need medical attention).
5pm Home from doctors. Swing directly into making dinner.
6pm Dinner done. Kids read / watch TV while I spend an hour on reviewing the first third of
the material for Project A.
7pm Swing into showering / bedtime stories / bedtime routines.
While this is occurring, wash dishes.
8:30pm Another hour on the Project A document review.
9:30pm Computer off; to bed to read and fall asleep.
My days, of which this is fairly typical, tend to be an ebb and flow of work and family duties. I usually do between 6 and 9 hours work on any given day (yesterday it was 7 hours, which is well within my norm), but a relatively small percentage of this is meetings, which is very good, and I rarely do paid work between school pick-up and dinner, which is taken up with family matters.
I don't work all my hours within the standard work day, and I don't work extreme chunks of time - a two-hour block is usually the maximum I'll do without interspersion of some other activity, which suits me (I find I am really losing focus by the 2-hour mark anyway).
Some days are more crowded than others, but what I tend not to have is much truly "dead" time - if I have hit a wall with one project or client, I switch over to another or to a household or writing activity, because there is no value in simply warming a seat while I wait for things to ungum or answers to arrive.
Freelancing from my home suits me much better than being in an office. I know now that it does. Assuming I can keep getting a reasonable flow of work, I think this is what I'll be doing for the medium- to long-term.
Monday, February 1, 2016
January
January was an odd month in a lot of ways. It was less summery and relaxed than I wanted it to be, punctuated by some unexpected sadnesses and challenges, and apparently possessed of wings - I cannot remember another school summer break evaporating so rapidly. The weirding of the weather didn't help either, nor my month-long health hiccup. It felt like a much more disjointed month than I am used to for kicking off the year, and it's left me with a pit of unease in my stomach that I'm hoping a productive February will shift.
I worked for almost all of the month, going back on 3 January after 2 weeks off over Christmas and New Year, and for the first time ever, I worked predominantly at home, with all three kids around. Although I did work the majority of January 2014 and 2015, with one week off only in each of those years, that was in the office, and my husband had the majority of the month off to look after the kids. Prior to that, I hadn't worked between Christmas and Australia Day since 2005 - the summer I was pregnant with my second daughter, when I was only working 2.5 days a week in any case. I've managed this by using leave or simply blocking out the time when freelancing.
It was neither as bad as I feared nor as smooth as I hoped; we had good days and less good days, I had effective work blocks and times when I was working at midnight to catch up on the day-time I hadn't been able to put in while mediating School Holiday Sibling Wars or taking the kids places. By the time my husband commenced his week off on 18 January, I was super ready to be able to concentrate more fully on work, although, as I was still physically here, it was still more prone to interruption than was ideal. I did end up taking 25 January off to make a 4-day long weekend with the public holiday on the 26th, and I really deeply needed to by then (not to mention that a day to prepare for the return of school was not optional!)
January was also a month in which a number of unexpected deaths shook our little bubble. Two acquaintances from our church died, both people that we did not know extremely well but were on a friendly terms with; in one case after a long illness, in the other case very suddenly. It might sound foolish, but I also felt personal sadness and loss at the death of David Bowie, and the girls were upset to learn of the death of "Professor Snape" (Alan Rickman). The pall of world events felt heavy in January - perhaps it's confirmation bias, but the news felt grimmer than ever, and a rising tide of futility and pointless rage threatened to overwhelm me more than once.
Facing the future, on an individual, familial and societal level, made us more anxious in this past month than it has for a while. Some of these nerves were / are "good" nerves - anticipation of my eldest's start to high school, for instance, which has gone very well so far. Others are less easy to belay with positive transitional experiences. We have some hard miles ahead this year in a number of areas, and realising this in January wasn't easy.
Of course, there were good aspects to the month as well - moments and days of lightness and joy, satisfaction and connection. We did a lot of family walks, which was great. My second daughter learned to ride her bike well. I participated in, and completely loved, Month of Poetry for the third year running. We had a truly superb family outing to Adventure Park in Geelong. We went swimming and caught up with friends and played board games and continued our rising addiction to colouring books.
So really it wasn't a terrible, awful, no-good, very-bad month, overall; but it was a month of more challenges and less vegetating than I had hoped and planned for, a month that allowed no easing into the year, but smacked us in the face with 2016-ness from the get-go.
Some years this is how it has to be, I guess.
I worked for almost all of the month, going back on 3 January after 2 weeks off over Christmas and New Year, and for the first time ever, I worked predominantly at home, with all three kids around. Although I did work the majority of January 2014 and 2015, with one week off only in each of those years, that was in the office, and my husband had the majority of the month off to look after the kids. Prior to that, I hadn't worked between Christmas and Australia Day since 2005 - the summer I was pregnant with my second daughter, when I was only working 2.5 days a week in any case. I've managed this by using leave or simply blocking out the time when freelancing.
It was neither as bad as I feared nor as smooth as I hoped; we had good days and less good days, I had effective work blocks and times when I was working at midnight to catch up on the day-time I hadn't been able to put in while mediating School Holiday Sibling Wars or taking the kids places. By the time my husband commenced his week off on 18 January, I was super ready to be able to concentrate more fully on work, although, as I was still physically here, it was still more prone to interruption than was ideal. I did end up taking 25 January off to make a 4-day long weekend with the public holiday on the 26th, and I really deeply needed to by then (not to mention that a day to prepare for the return of school was not optional!)
January was also a month in which a number of unexpected deaths shook our little bubble. Two acquaintances from our church died, both people that we did not know extremely well but were on a friendly terms with; in one case after a long illness, in the other case very suddenly. It might sound foolish, but I also felt personal sadness and loss at the death of David Bowie, and the girls were upset to learn of the death of "Professor Snape" (Alan Rickman). The pall of world events felt heavy in January - perhaps it's confirmation bias, but the news felt grimmer than ever, and a rising tide of futility and pointless rage threatened to overwhelm me more than once.
Facing the future, on an individual, familial and societal level, made us more anxious in this past month than it has for a while. Some of these nerves were / are "good" nerves - anticipation of my eldest's start to high school, for instance, which has gone very well so far. Others are less easy to belay with positive transitional experiences. We have some hard miles ahead this year in a number of areas, and realising this in January wasn't easy.
Of course, there were good aspects to the month as well - moments and days of lightness and joy, satisfaction and connection. We did a lot of family walks, which was great. My second daughter learned to ride her bike well. I participated in, and completely loved, Month of Poetry for the third year running. We had a truly superb family outing to Adventure Park in Geelong. We went swimming and caught up with friends and played board games and continued our rising addiction to colouring books.
So really it wasn't a terrible, awful, no-good, very-bad month, overall; but it was a month of more challenges and less vegetating than I had hoped and planned for, a month that allowed no easing into the year, but smacked us in the face with 2016-ness from the get-go.
Some years this is how it has to be, I guess.
Sunday, December 27, 2015
Working and Motherhood: Salvos in the unwinnable war
The Guardian is re-running links to some of its more popular pieces from 2015 as the year wends to an end. They've just relinked this one, which I remember well as it was published on my very last day of salaried employment - the very day, some would argue, that I ceased to be a role model of working motherhood to my three girls.
As luck would have it, I have been able to build up a good freelance clientele since then and am close to fully employed (I average 4 days a week) in my own business. I didn't know that this would happen when I left my job, though, and I took the leap in full readiness to go through a period, possibly a lengthy one, of being a stay at home parent without paid employment.
It's also true that, as a freelancer, I work mostly from home, rendering my job far less visible, or intrusive, to my kids than my salaried work was. Except in rare cases, I can do all the school runs, help out with school activities, take them to all their extracurriculars, and so forth. To all intents and purposes, I, in fact, *present* as a stay at home parent, despite my income-earning activities.
I feel, really, that I have a foot in both - or indeed, all - camps. I've been a stay at home parent, on unpaid long leave from an employer. I've worked part time, both in an office and from home, for a salaried employer. I've freelanced, both from home an on client sites - and am now doing so again. I've worked fulltime in an office. All of these permutations I have tried, in my 12.5 years of being a parent. (An aside, but, having sipped from each cup, I would rank "stay at home no income, especially with preschool kids" as Hardest; "fulltime in office" as Middle; and all of the part-time or freelance options as Easiest / Best, in terms of energy, satisfaction, life balance and self-esteem. Being at home all the time with kids is really demanding - not bad, often very rewarding, but not a walk in the park by a long stretch).
Back to the article: the gist of the findings of this study is that having a mother who works outside the home benefits children, particularly girls, in terms of role modelling career potential and more equitable distribution of household labour.
As always, the study is one study among many and can't account for variation from the curve. Just as other studies that purport to show that having both parents in paid work outside the home is detrimental to children, particularly very young children, it doesn't take into account individual characteristics or circumstances. It merely observes - perhaps - a correlation between certain maternal work patterns and certain career outcomes in daughters.
It also doesn't make much of the fact that, for many women, to work or not to work outside the home is simply not a choice at all. For single-parent households or for households where the other breadwinner's wage is too low to support all the family needs, combining work outside the home and parenthood is just something that has to happen at some point. In that circumstance, there is no doubt the working mother is modelling valuable traits to her children - responsibility, care, prudence - but whether it's some grand career decision is more questionable.
I would also say that women who don't work outside the home model valuable behaviours to their children with a similar frequency to working mothers, even if the particular traits on display may differ.
It's also not lost on me that these kinds of studies - whichever way they blow - never, but NEVER, ask about paternal work patterns and their effect on children. (Yes, I know there are a number of studies about absent second-parents, but not ones who are there but working fulltime outside the home). There is a moral freighting attached to whatever a mother-role person does that just does not attach to men, and it shits me but good.
All that aside, there's one thing the article gets absolutely dead right in my view. It's in this final quote from a working mother by the name of Rebecca Allen.
I suppose if there is one overarching thought that I would close with, it's this: the whole thing is a bit of a trap, in my view. The idea that paid work is a universal good or universal ill. The idea that people who give birth are judged more harshly for the disposition of their time post-children than people who contribute genetic material. The idea that parents should somehow be able to be both perfect wage-bots and assiduous contributors to their children's every moment, including during working hours. If it all sounds impossibly difficult and dreary, well, that's only because it is. I don't have a good, generically applicable answer, and here's a tip: neither does anybody else. We all just do the best we can with what we've got, and hope like hell it's enough.
As luck would have it, I have been able to build up a good freelance clientele since then and am close to fully employed (I average 4 days a week) in my own business. I didn't know that this would happen when I left my job, though, and I took the leap in full readiness to go through a period, possibly a lengthy one, of being a stay at home parent without paid employment.
It's also true that, as a freelancer, I work mostly from home, rendering my job far less visible, or intrusive, to my kids than my salaried work was. Except in rare cases, I can do all the school runs, help out with school activities, take them to all their extracurriculars, and so forth. To all intents and purposes, I, in fact, *present* as a stay at home parent, despite my income-earning activities.
I feel, really, that I have a foot in both - or indeed, all - camps. I've been a stay at home parent, on unpaid long leave from an employer. I've worked part time, both in an office and from home, for a salaried employer. I've freelanced, both from home an on client sites - and am now doing so again. I've worked fulltime in an office. All of these permutations I have tried, in my 12.5 years of being a parent. (An aside, but, having sipped from each cup, I would rank "stay at home no income, especially with preschool kids" as Hardest; "fulltime in office" as Middle; and all of the part-time or freelance options as Easiest / Best, in terms of energy, satisfaction, life balance and self-esteem. Being at home all the time with kids is really demanding - not bad, often very rewarding, but not a walk in the park by a long stretch).
Back to the article: the gist of the findings of this study is that having a mother who works outside the home benefits children, particularly girls, in terms of role modelling career potential and more equitable distribution of household labour.
As always, the study is one study among many and can't account for variation from the curve. Just as other studies that purport to show that having both parents in paid work outside the home is detrimental to children, particularly very young children, it doesn't take into account individual characteristics or circumstances. It merely observes - perhaps - a correlation between certain maternal work patterns and certain career outcomes in daughters.
It also doesn't make much of the fact that, for many women, to work or not to work outside the home is simply not a choice at all. For single-parent households or for households where the other breadwinner's wage is too low to support all the family needs, combining work outside the home and parenthood is just something that has to happen at some point. In that circumstance, there is no doubt the working mother is modelling valuable traits to her children - responsibility, care, prudence - but whether it's some grand career decision is more questionable.
I would also say that women who don't work outside the home model valuable behaviours to their children with a similar frequency to working mothers, even if the particular traits on display may differ.
It's also not lost on me that these kinds of studies - whichever way they blow - never, but NEVER, ask about paternal work patterns and their effect on children. (Yes, I know there are a number of studies about absent second-parents, but not ones who are there but working fulltime outside the home). There is a moral freighting attached to whatever a mother-role person does that just does not attach to men, and it shits me but good.
All that aside, there's one thing the article gets absolutely dead right in my view. It's in this final quote from a working mother by the name of Rebecca Allen.
Allen said that schools also need to adjust their demands on parents. “We’ve got to stop primary schools from having a day every week where parents are expected to dress up their children in some complicated outfit, or make something, or bring something in, or turn up to help with something or have an assembly,” she said.With this slight non sequitur, it would not be possible for me to agree more. Even in my current situation, where I *can* pop up to the school for special events as needed, it's a time drain and often a stressor that I just don't need, especially when I'm busy with client work. It was a lot worse - really quite terrible, in fact - when I worked fulltime in the office. And it isn't only working parents who find this stuff demanding - just ask the worn-out prep and grade one parents with toddlers and babies in tow how much they enjoy these weekly letters of demand for extra effort.
I suppose if there is one overarching thought that I would close with, it's this: the whole thing is a bit of a trap, in my view. The idea that paid work is a universal good or universal ill. The idea that people who give birth are judged more harshly for the disposition of their time post-children than people who contribute genetic material. The idea that parents should somehow be able to be both perfect wage-bots and assiduous contributors to their children's every moment, including during working hours. If it all sounds impossibly difficult and dreary, well, that's only because it is. I don't have a good, generically applicable answer, and here's a tip: neither does anybody else. We all just do the best we can with what we've got, and hope like hell it's enough.
Wednesday, November 11, 2015
On changes to plan
Back on 1 August, when I took on my current major freelance project, it was scheduled to end on 30 September, right at the tail end of the school holidays. My plan, at that stage, was to work hard til the 30th, enjoy our 5-day spring family holiday, come back and have a couple of weeks catching up on life stuff and facilitating our kitchen renovation before starting to source new work.
The best-laid plans of mice and men, etc.
Firstly, although the spring holiday still happened, my project got extended to 16 October, which was a readjustment to my ideas about the first two weeks of term. Then the kitchen reno got pushed back a week to start, and has dragged on longer than we'd hoped (it is *almost* there now, but it's felt like a pretty lengthy 3.5 weeks so far). Then, just as I was looking with longing eyes towards 16 October and Stumps Day on Project, the client extended again, so now I will in fact be finishing with this project tomorrow, on 12 November.
Of course, from the time the second extension kicked in, I've been diligently telling myself, Never mind though, it's all good for the bank account ... and you'll probably be really quiet with work from then on. Maybe you won't get any at all til next year! (This thought was both attractive and terrifying in equal measure - the ancient push-pull of more time / better health management / family tasks vs money to pay the bills).
Turns out ... notsomuch.
I've just been very fortunate to secure an engagement on a major project for a different organisation, doing quite similar work to that I've been doing, but in a new environment. My new client is comfortable with my preference to work at home other than for meetings / briefings, and the work is very substantial - it will amount to between 2 and 5 days every available week between next week and the end of March next year. (The nature of it will necessitate a tidal work pattern, where more hours are performed coming up to document release dates and fewer in weeks when documents are out for review).
So my ideas about having a long, long summer have been kyboshed. I'm still taking 17 December - 4 January off - the kids finish school for the year on the 18th, and I am hosting family Christmas Day here this year, so I really wanted to keep that pre-Christmas week free of work. I can't remember if I've ever worked the gap between Christmas and New Year, but I certainly have no intention of starting this year either.
I would've liked to take longer. I was looking forward to taking longer. But the exigencies of this project just make that impractical. It was certainly not an issue over which I was prepared to give away an interesting project that will assure my income is at a solid level for the first half of next year at least.
I won't go onsite to the client in the January weeks if I can avoid it. I think I'll manage, juggling around the kids, with a combination of swap days with friends, fun days out with grandparents, my partner taking a week off, and home days where the kids and I do our own things, in our own ways. I certainly won't work 5 days any of those weeks, either, leaving some time for beach, park and library trips, ice-creams by the bay and afternoon teas in cafes.
Sometimes changes to plan are scary, and sometimes they are good. Sometimes they are both at once :-) The biggest trick for me is going to be pacing myself so I don't precipitate another health crisis; I will no doubt flare off and on with my chronic conditions, but I can manage flares in a way that means I can keep functioning if I am careful and don't try to thrash myself along.
It's nice, though, to have work, to feel like I didn't make a mistake leaving my job earlier in the year. It's nice to think that when I decided to try for a work style and pattern that suits me and my family, that the gamble has paid off. That makes me feel good, even while I am a little daunted too.
This is post 11 in NaBloPoMo. 11 down, 19 to go!
The best-laid plans of mice and men, etc.
Firstly, although the spring holiday still happened, my project got extended to 16 October, which was a readjustment to my ideas about the first two weeks of term. Then the kitchen reno got pushed back a week to start, and has dragged on longer than we'd hoped (it is *almost* there now, but it's felt like a pretty lengthy 3.5 weeks so far). Then, just as I was looking with longing eyes towards 16 October and Stumps Day on Project, the client extended again, so now I will in fact be finishing with this project tomorrow, on 12 November.
Of course, from the time the second extension kicked in, I've been diligently telling myself, Never mind though, it's all good for the bank account ... and you'll probably be really quiet with work from then on. Maybe you won't get any at all til next year! (This thought was both attractive and terrifying in equal measure - the ancient push-pull of more time / better health management / family tasks vs money to pay the bills).
Turns out ... notsomuch.
I've just been very fortunate to secure an engagement on a major project for a different organisation, doing quite similar work to that I've been doing, but in a new environment. My new client is comfortable with my preference to work at home other than for meetings / briefings, and the work is very substantial - it will amount to between 2 and 5 days every available week between next week and the end of March next year. (The nature of it will necessitate a tidal work pattern, where more hours are performed coming up to document release dates and fewer in weeks when documents are out for review).
So my ideas about having a long, long summer have been kyboshed. I'm still taking 17 December - 4 January off - the kids finish school for the year on the 18th, and I am hosting family Christmas Day here this year, so I really wanted to keep that pre-Christmas week free of work. I can't remember if I've ever worked the gap between Christmas and New Year, but I certainly have no intention of starting this year either.
I would've liked to take longer. I was looking forward to taking longer. But the exigencies of this project just make that impractical. It was certainly not an issue over which I was prepared to give away an interesting project that will assure my income is at a solid level for the first half of next year at least.
I won't go onsite to the client in the January weeks if I can avoid it. I think I'll manage, juggling around the kids, with a combination of swap days with friends, fun days out with grandparents, my partner taking a week off, and home days where the kids and I do our own things, in our own ways. I certainly won't work 5 days any of those weeks, either, leaving some time for beach, park and library trips, ice-creams by the bay and afternoon teas in cafes.
Sometimes changes to plan are scary, and sometimes they are good. Sometimes they are both at once :-) The biggest trick for me is going to be pacing myself so I don't precipitate another health crisis; I will no doubt flare off and on with my chronic conditions, but I can manage flares in a way that means I can keep functioning if I am careful and don't try to thrash myself along.
It's nice, though, to have work, to feel like I didn't make a mistake leaving my job earlier in the year. It's nice to think that when I decided to try for a work style and pattern that suits me and my family, that the gamble has paid off. That makes me feel good, even while I am a little daunted too.
This is post 11 in NaBloPoMo. 11 down, 19 to go!
Friday, September 18, 2015
School holidays: A holiday from school (Let me explain!)
Today is the last day of school term 3 for public primary school students here in Melbourne, Australia. It's been a long 11 weeks of mostly bad weather, only starting to shift to a more springlike temperature in the past 3 weeks or so. A lot of people seem to have copped fairly nasty viruses this term; our family has been lucky, suffering only an annoyingly protracted but relatively mild communal cold. In our household, all but the first two weeks of this term has overlapped with a large freelance project of mine, which has involved 4-5 days a week of work snuggled in among the school days, evenings and weekends as I can manage it.
Despite my kids being uber-fractious with each other this week, and the fact that I will be juggling work for the first 9 days of the school break (I'm taking Weds-Fri of week 2 off my projects), I am looking forward with a high degree of intensity to the holidays.
This isn't just because I think the kids are really, reeeeeeeally ready for some downtime, or because it'll be nice to have some family time (although both of those are true too). It's because of this: school is work, not just for students, but for their responsible adults.
I have friends who homeschool their children, and there's no doubt in my mind that that path involves both work in itself, and opportunity costs for caregiver potential lost income - indeed, I think few people would deny it.What I think sometimes gets a bit lost though is the fact that sending kids to school also entails work, and costs, and opportunity costs too.
Getting children to school on time, with lunches packed, is work. Picking them up on time is work, and after school care, should you use that, costs money. Every week, new notes come home - my record with three children in school was 19 notes in one week - all of them requiring money or effort, or sometimes both, to respond to properly. Indeed, the unceasing flood of monetary demands gets overwhelming in terms three and four - one memorable week early in the term, I handed over $1200 to the school for 3x excursions; 2x camps; new windcheaters for two kids; and three separate fundraising efforts. This is a public school, bear in mind. ($1200 in a week is unusual, and is of course largely derived from the two $400+ camp fees for the elder two kids, but nonetheless, you get the drift).
Helping and supporting children with homework and projects can be a lot of work, even if your kids are self-motivated. Supporting the plethora of special events at school can be an enormous amount of work, given how heavily schools rely on caregiver volunteers - between helping with school cooking, the Father's Day stall, attending and helping with Fun Run, Athletics, Book Week and Open Day events, my partner's role on school council, the garden working bees and the Open Night, this term we have clocked up about 10 days total volunteer time at school between us, and there are caregivers who do much more than we do.
I'm not saying any of this as a whinge - not exactly - but more, I'm just acknowledging the reality that schooling children is work, for the whole household, and sometimes a break is needed from that work, just as in any job. Of course a lot of the work of school is enjoyable work - I love helping with school cooking, for instance, and being there to see Athletics and Book Week fun - but two weeks off from the logistical, organisational and practical work of supporting three children at school is most welcome and most needed.
Despite my kids being uber-fractious with each other this week, and the fact that I will be juggling work for the first 9 days of the school break (I'm taking Weds-Fri of week 2 off my projects), I am looking forward with a high degree of intensity to the holidays.
This isn't just because I think the kids are really, reeeeeeeally ready for some downtime, or because it'll be nice to have some family time (although both of those are true too). It's because of this: school is work, not just for students, but for their responsible adults.
I have friends who homeschool their children, and there's no doubt in my mind that that path involves both work in itself, and opportunity costs for caregiver potential lost income - indeed, I think few people would deny it.What I think sometimes gets a bit lost though is the fact that sending kids to school also entails work, and costs, and opportunity costs too.
Getting children to school on time, with lunches packed, is work. Picking them up on time is work, and after school care, should you use that, costs money. Every week, new notes come home - my record with three children in school was 19 notes in one week - all of them requiring money or effort, or sometimes both, to respond to properly. Indeed, the unceasing flood of monetary demands gets overwhelming in terms three and four - one memorable week early in the term, I handed over $1200 to the school for 3x excursions; 2x camps; new windcheaters for two kids; and three separate fundraising efforts. This is a public school, bear in mind. ($1200 in a week is unusual, and is of course largely derived from the two $400+ camp fees for the elder two kids, but nonetheless, you get the drift).
Helping and supporting children with homework and projects can be a lot of work, even if your kids are self-motivated. Supporting the plethora of special events at school can be an enormous amount of work, given how heavily schools rely on caregiver volunteers - between helping with school cooking, the Father's Day stall, attending and helping with Fun Run, Athletics, Book Week and Open Day events, my partner's role on school council, the garden working bees and the Open Night, this term we have clocked up about 10 days total volunteer time at school between us, and there are caregivers who do much more than we do.
I'm not saying any of this as a whinge - not exactly - but more, I'm just acknowledging the reality that schooling children is work, for the whole household, and sometimes a break is needed from that work, just as in any job. Of course a lot of the work of school is enjoyable work - I love helping with school cooking, for instance, and being there to see Athletics and Book Week fun - but two weeks off from the logistical, organisational and practical work of supporting three children at school is most welcome and most needed.
Thursday, August 6, 2015
The juggle
I have been, let's be totally honest, spoiled over the past 5 weeks.
Oh, sure, I've been *sick*, but that's situation normal with chronic illnesses at play. Yeah, I've had parenting and household duties as usual, including a week of solo parenting while my partner was away for work; but this is not different from any given week in any of the past 12 years. I've had a few extra community / family things to deal with, but that happens from time to time too.
What I haven't had, though, is paid work to juggle as well as all of the above. I've had the two weeks of the school holidays, then the first three weeks of term, where, other than writing and selling some review pieces (which is definitely nice!), I haven't been combining any form of income-generating labour with all the other kinds of labour and activity that I engage in.
This is, it must be said, the *very first such three weeks* in my life as an adult. I have always worked - often part-time (when finishing my Masters degree in my 20s, and later, from the birth of my eldest daughter until she was almost 9) but always juggling paid work with love's labours. I certainly have had several-month stretches of time out of paid work for maternity leave and long service leave, but these have always previously coincided with the having of babies and / or toddlers, so discretionary time has not really been a thing in my world.
It has been a luxury that I found strange at first. Being able to take my time grocery shopping, because there was no rush. Being able to clean my house the way I want to, without putting stuff off to the never never. Time for conversations and reading; time to try new recipes and spend half a day hunting down elements for Book Week costumes. Time to nap, after a bad night with a health flare. Time to watch the odd mystery movie, or listen to podcasts. Time to go for longer walks, and catch up with friends. Time to do more volunteering at the kids' school, and properly investigate my health issues. Time to have a date or two with my husband, sans kids.
This week, I've just started my first sizeable freelance project, and it's coincided with a busy week in our lives (because: naturally!) It's been borne home to me very quickly just HOW great those three weeks really were, with that 6 hours of time every week day. Of course, having the work is great, but the juggle is less so. Today, already, I had to opt out of going up to school for the 2-hour costume parade, because I just couldn't spare that long from the work. Next week the kids will be back in after care on one night, and, I suspect, left to their own devices on one or two more so I can meet my deadlines. Crashing fatigue, as ever, is my enemy, and I don't have the space to be as gentle with myself as I've been free to be, in the three weeks gone.
This project is slated to finish on or before 30 September. In itself, having an end date is an excellent thing for me psychologically; I can pace myself better if there is actually a finish line somewhere. We're going away not too long after that for a week, and I think I'm going to see if I can manage things to have another three-week interregnum before taking on more project work - a week away with the family, and a good couple of weeks gearing down in my daily life. After all, this is why I wanted to freelance again - ebbs and flows are the only way to really sustain myself.
Oh, sure, I've been *sick*, but that's situation normal with chronic illnesses at play. Yeah, I've had parenting and household duties as usual, including a week of solo parenting while my partner was away for work; but this is not different from any given week in any of the past 12 years. I've had a few extra community / family things to deal with, but that happens from time to time too.
What I haven't had, though, is paid work to juggle as well as all of the above. I've had the two weeks of the school holidays, then the first three weeks of term, where, other than writing and selling some review pieces (which is definitely nice!), I haven't been combining any form of income-generating labour with all the other kinds of labour and activity that I engage in.
This is, it must be said, the *very first such three weeks* in my life as an adult. I have always worked - often part-time (when finishing my Masters degree in my 20s, and later, from the birth of my eldest daughter until she was almost 9) but always juggling paid work with love's labours. I certainly have had several-month stretches of time out of paid work for maternity leave and long service leave, but these have always previously coincided with the having of babies and / or toddlers, so discretionary time has not really been a thing in my world.
It has been a luxury that I found strange at first. Being able to take my time grocery shopping, because there was no rush. Being able to clean my house the way I want to, without putting stuff off to the never never. Time for conversations and reading; time to try new recipes and spend half a day hunting down elements for Book Week costumes. Time to nap, after a bad night with a health flare. Time to watch the odd mystery movie, or listen to podcasts. Time to go for longer walks, and catch up with friends. Time to do more volunteering at the kids' school, and properly investigate my health issues. Time to have a date or two with my husband, sans kids.
This week, I've just started my first sizeable freelance project, and it's coincided with a busy week in our lives (because: naturally!) It's been borne home to me very quickly just HOW great those three weeks really were, with that 6 hours of time every week day. Of course, having the work is great, but the juggle is less so. Today, already, I had to opt out of going up to school for the 2-hour costume parade, because I just couldn't spare that long from the work. Next week the kids will be back in after care on one night, and, I suspect, left to their own devices on one or two more so I can meet my deadlines. Crashing fatigue, as ever, is my enemy, and I don't have the space to be as gentle with myself as I've been free to be, in the three weeks gone.
This project is slated to finish on or before 30 September. In itself, having an end date is an excellent thing for me psychologically; I can pace myself better if there is actually a finish line somewhere. We're going away not too long after that for a week, and I think I'm going to see if I can manage things to have another three-week interregnum before taking on more project work - a week away with the family, and a good couple of weeks gearing down in my daily life. After all, this is why I wanted to freelance again - ebbs and flows are the only way to really sustain myself.
Saturday, June 13, 2015
Why I'm hoping for a slow start to business
It's just 12 days now until my final day with my employer, and the 10 days following that somewhat momentous day are jam-packed. The very day after, I've a medical specialist appointment, then early school collection for the kids for the end of term. A weekend at ComiCon, a few days in Marysville, home for a day, then a dinner party. Breath is expected to be drawn sometime around 6 July, although, even then, it is still school holidays, so the kids will be with me. (Not that this is either a bad thing or a drain - it's actually going to be great - but it will change the discretion available in my time, for sure).
Officially, I'm back in business (as a freelancer) from 10 July. So far, although I have had some interest, I haven't got much work actually booked in - and it turns out, I'm really happy about that.
I thought I'd be a lot more stressed than I am about the prospect of slim pickings in my first months back in self-employment. Thanks to a combination of rebudgeting and rearranging expenses, though, the immediate financial pressure to be remunerated is much less intense than I had feared. (This doesn't mean this situation can drag on indefinitely, mind you - but one thing at a time).
More importantly than this easing of direct monetary constraint, though - much more importantly, in fact - is that I am starting to feel that I need a slow start to business in order to collect myself and come back to myself. I am beginning to value, highly, the notion of a July and August, and even a September and October, with relatively little paid work arriving in my Inbox. So much am I feeling that this would be optimal that I am choosing not to promote my services any further than I have already done at this stage. (I will, in the fullness of time - there are a couple of good avenues I haven't explored yet).
Some of this is just pragmatism: the pile-up of life jobs, of administrivia, of clutter-mess, is sufficiently profound that getting it in order is going to be a part-time job all by itself for a while. Some of it is related to my health, which is giving me grief again, although in a charmingly new way than last year (hurray!) and will necessitate further investigations, one of them surgical. Some of it has to do with personal goals, things I'd really love to have some time to spend on - reconnecting with my children; writing my novel, my poetry, and the verse novella I am planning; designing the family photobooks I am making; the volunteering I want to do at the local community centre.
I know - oh how I know - what kind of privilege I have that allows me to say, Hey, if I don't make much for 4 or 5 months, that's OK. I know many other people just as sick as I, just as bone-tired as I, with just as many responsibilities and dreams, don't have this privilege, and that really does suck.
I'm going to try not to squander this opportunity. That's really the best way I can do honour to the circumstances and people who've made it possible - to make the best use of a slow start that I can, in building my health and my creativity and my family.
Officially, I'm back in business (as a freelancer) from 10 July. So far, although I have had some interest, I haven't got much work actually booked in - and it turns out, I'm really happy about that.
I thought I'd be a lot more stressed than I am about the prospect of slim pickings in my first months back in self-employment. Thanks to a combination of rebudgeting and rearranging expenses, though, the immediate financial pressure to be remunerated is much less intense than I had feared. (This doesn't mean this situation can drag on indefinitely, mind you - but one thing at a time).
More importantly than this easing of direct monetary constraint, though - much more importantly, in fact - is that I am starting to feel that I need a slow start to business in order to collect myself and come back to myself. I am beginning to value, highly, the notion of a July and August, and even a September and October, with relatively little paid work arriving in my Inbox. So much am I feeling that this would be optimal that I am choosing not to promote my services any further than I have already done at this stage. (I will, in the fullness of time - there are a couple of good avenues I haven't explored yet).
Some of this is just pragmatism: the pile-up of life jobs, of administrivia, of clutter-mess, is sufficiently profound that getting it in order is going to be a part-time job all by itself for a while. Some of it is related to my health, which is giving me grief again, although in a charmingly new way than last year (hurray!) and will necessitate further investigations, one of them surgical. Some of it has to do with personal goals, things I'd really love to have some time to spend on - reconnecting with my children; writing my novel, my poetry, and the verse novella I am planning; designing the family photobooks I am making; the volunteering I want to do at the local community centre.
I know - oh how I know - what kind of privilege I have that allows me to say, Hey, if I don't make much for 4 or 5 months, that's OK. I know many other people just as sick as I, just as bone-tired as I, with just as many responsibilities and dreams, don't have this privilege, and that really does suck.
I'm going to try not to squander this opportunity. That's really the best way I can do honour to the circumstances and people who've made it possible - to make the best use of a slow start that I can, in building my health and my creativity and my family.
Thursday, May 28, 2015
On changing the game
So the big news here is that I resigned from my job on Monday. Four weeks today, on Thursday 25 June, I'll be once again self-employed, by my own free and considered choice.
I've been heading towards this decision for a while now. My workplace was very good about making some adjustments for me when and after I was so sick last year, and I felt, despite a few reservations, that it would be the fair thing to do to give the part-time jobshare arrangement a proper, serious try. I feel I really have done that, in the past 5 months - I've done the best work that I was capable of, and I think (I hope) I've delivered some value. My jobshare partner is an absolute delight, and working with her has been very positive.
However, with the best will in the world, the challenges and volume of the work, and the reality of being part of an organisation in a state of radical flux, have proven incompatible with maintaining my health in any kind of equilibrium, or keeping balance in my life.
And this is not a small thing, either - the life logistics challenges are as unrelenting as they've been from the very start of this 2-year journey. One of the enormous boons of freelancing for me in 2011-13 was the almost total flexibility it gives around how you organise your time. (Not necessarily "how much time you work", but when and how you deploy it). Clients, on the whole, do not care if you spent Tuesday morning at a school cross-country and the dentist, and picked up the slack by working a few hours Wednesday night. If you deliver the right quality of work by the deadline, they're not interested in what path you walked to get there. This is not the case for salaried employment, and I have never really made a good, long-lasting peace with the timetable juggle that having to be "somewhere else" most of the time imposes.
Piecing together office work with school runs, sick days, dental appointments, special occasions for the kids, the everyday business of family life, is often fractured, and often balanced on a hair, in a way that I just didn't have to contend with when I was freelancing. Obviously sharing the load with my partner has been all that has made this possible, but even there, the solution is imperfect, because his job also (not unreasonably) has expectations of him.
All that said, it's not a small decision, choosing to give away stable employment and move into the precariat. I acknowledge the privilege I have, because I am in a relationship with a partner in stable, well-paid employment, in even being able to take this risk.
My plan is to take most of the month of July off. This will allow me to enjoy ComiCon with my family; relax in the two weeks of the school holidays with the spouse and kids (including a few days in Marysville); have a bit of concentrated novel-writing time; do some decluttering and reorganising; and clear off a backlog of life administration jobs that have been piling up. After that, I'm going to start up freelancing again. I hope there will be some work - we'll see. I did enjoy freelancing a great deal in 2011-13, and I hope I will again.
I'm going to give it a good go, and only start regular-job-hunting in the second half of 2016 if there just isn't enough freelance work going. I'm already beginning the logistical part of this, with my newly-reissued ABN, and putting together my rates sheet and portfolio. Next will be a simple website, business cards, and work email address.
I think we'll be OK financially, so long as I can get enough work to go close to, or ideally replace, my part-time salary. I feel that if money gets tight, my skills are current enough that I should be able to find another salaried job if I need to next year. For now, freelancing is the right direction for me, though, and what I am hoping for is to recapture the flow in a way that helps me sustain myself and my family.
I've been heading towards this decision for a while now. My workplace was very good about making some adjustments for me when and after I was so sick last year, and I felt, despite a few reservations, that it would be the fair thing to do to give the part-time jobshare arrangement a proper, serious try. I feel I really have done that, in the past 5 months - I've done the best work that I was capable of, and I think (I hope) I've delivered some value. My jobshare partner is an absolute delight, and working with her has been very positive.
However, with the best will in the world, the challenges and volume of the work, and the reality of being part of an organisation in a state of radical flux, have proven incompatible with maintaining my health in any kind of equilibrium, or keeping balance in my life.
And this is not a small thing, either - the life logistics challenges are as unrelenting as they've been from the very start of this 2-year journey. One of the enormous boons of freelancing for me in 2011-13 was the almost total flexibility it gives around how you organise your time. (Not necessarily "how much time you work", but when and how you deploy it). Clients, on the whole, do not care if you spent Tuesday morning at a school cross-country and the dentist, and picked up the slack by working a few hours Wednesday night. If you deliver the right quality of work by the deadline, they're not interested in what path you walked to get there. This is not the case for salaried employment, and I have never really made a good, long-lasting peace with the timetable juggle that having to be "somewhere else" most of the time imposes.
Piecing together office work with school runs, sick days, dental appointments, special occasions for the kids, the everyday business of family life, is often fractured, and often balanced on a hair, in a way that I just didn't have to contend with when I was freelancing. Obviously sharing the load with my partner has been all that has made this possible, but even there, the solution is imperfect, because his job also (not unreasonably) has expectations of him.
All that said, it's not a small decision, choosing to give away stable employment and move into the precariat. I acknowledge the privilege I have, because I am in a relationship with a partner in stable, well-paid employment, in even being able to take this risk.
My plan is to take most of the month of July off. This will allow me to enjoy ComiCon with my family; relax in the two weeks of the school holidays with the spouse and kids (including a few days in Marysville); have a bit of concentrated novel-writing time; do some decluttering and reorganising; and clear off a backlog of life administration jobs that have been piling up. After that, I'm going to start up freelancing again. I hope there will be some work - we'll see. I did enjoy freelancing a great deal in 2011-13, and I hope I will again.
I'm going to give it a good go, and only start regular-job-hunting in the second half of 2016 if there just isn't enough freelance work going. I'm already beginning the logistical part of this, with my newly-reissued ABN, and putting together my rates sheet and portfolio. Next will be a simple website, business cards, and work email address.
I think we'll be OK financially, so long as I can get enough work to go close to, or ideally replace, my part-time salary. I feel that if money gets tight, my skills are current enough that I should be able to find another salaried job if I need to next year. For now, freelancing is the right direction for me, though, and what I am hoping for is to recapture the flow in a way that helps me sustain myself and my family.
Monday, April 15, 2013
What we did on our holidays
The kids are back to school and kinder today, and we have an even busier week than usual, with husband having work functions on two nights, interstate friends visiting on Wednesday, me attending the Stella Awards on Thursday night and a party catch up with friends at Werribee Mansion on Saturday. This, in addition to the usual rounds (school, kinder, gymnastics, dancing, swimming, guitar, piano), a full working week for hubs, and a reasonable, although not crippling, amount of paid project work booked in for me.
I think we will be OK with this merry whirl, though, because we're fortified with what ended up being a really nice term 1 break. Although hubs only had one week day off work (last Friday), I was able to organise my projects so that I worked hard through Easter but was then work-free from 5pm on the first Tuesday of the hols til the following Monday afternoon, then working at a moderate pace only (3-4 hours a day) for a few days, and off work again Friday-Sunday for the final stretch. This meant I had lots of time to do fun things with the kids, which was great.
We didn't do anything too earth shattering for most of it. The kids had sleepovers at their grandparents, went to a schoolfriend's birthday party, did crafts, played together, watched TV and read books. I took them to see Zambezia at the cinema and we played video games in the arcade. We had pizza delivered and went out for Thai. We rode bikes and scooters and went to the park. They came with me shopping, to the physio and to the library. The big kids went to a CSIRO Double Helix Club science day, while I took the 4 year old to Collingwood Children's Farm for a few hours. We had an Easter egg hunt and went to Easter Sunday church, as it our wont. We had playdates and catch ups with quite a few different friends, which was really nice. We also had one little (2-day, 1-night) trip away, to Ballarat, which I will be posting about tomorrow, but suffice to say that it felt like a lot longer than two days away, in a good way.
The good thing, for me, was that this was the first school holidays where I feel like I was able to properly and effectively balance ongoing work with having the kids here fulltime. I didn't work over the summer hols at all, and I worked far too much (ie fulltime) in week 2 of the July hols, and all of the September hols, last year. Before that, I wasn't working nearly as much or as consistently, so it was less of an issue.
I'm not as booked with work now as I was last September - for which I give heartfelt thanks! - but I do have two projects live, one nearing its final phase but the other just really getting started. Neither project is small, and the potential for another "lost" holiday was there.
What was great about *these* holidays, though, is that I really feel we did not lose them, as time together and as downtime. I had to push it pretty hard over Easter - I did 43 hours in 5 days, and that's with losing most of Good Friday to social things and Easter Sunday morning to egg hunts and services - but the prize for doing so was some very nice quality time with the kids in the week following, and the ability to comfortably integrate the work after that into times when the kids were sleeping, at grandparents, playing together or reading.
I don't know what will happen for me work-wise after the conclusion of one of my current projects in May, when I start to actively source new work; but whatever way it goes, I hope I can manage the term 2 break as effectively as this one.
I think we will be OK with this merry whirl, though, because we're fortified with what ended up being a really nice term 1 break. Although hubs only had one week day off work (last Friday), I was able to organise my projects so that I worked hard through Easter but was then work-free from 5pm on the first Tuesday of the hols til the following Monday afternoon, then working at a moderate pace only (3-4 hours a day) for a few days, and off work again Friday-Sunday for the final stretch. This meant I had lots of time to do fun things with the kids, which was great.
We didn't do anything too earth shattering for most of it. The kids had sleepovers at their grandparents, went to a schoolfriend's birthday party, did crafts, played together, watched TV and read books. I took them to see Zambezia at the cinema and we played video games in the arcade. We had pizza delivered and went out for Thai. We rode bikes and scooters and went to the park. They came with me shopping, to the physio and to the library. The big kids went to a CSIRO Double Helix Club science day, while I took the 4 year old to Collingwood Children's Farm for a few hours. We had an Easter egg hunt and went to Easter Sunday church, as it our wont. We had playdates and catch ups with quite a few different friends, which was really nice. We also had one little (2-day, 1-night) trip away, to Ballarat, which I will be posting about tomorrow, but suffice to say that it felt like a lot longer than two days away, in a good way.
The good thing, for me, was that this was the first school holidays where I feel like I was able to properly and effectively balance ongoing work with having the kids here fulltime. I didn't work over the summer hols at all, and I worked far too much (ie fulltime) in week 2 of the July hols, and all of the September hols, last year. Before that, I wasn't working nearly as much or as consistently, so it was less of an issue.
I'm not as booked with work now as I was last September - for which I give heartfelt thanks! - but I do have two projects live, one nearing its final phase but the other just really getting started. Neither project is small, and the potential for another "lost" holiday was there.
What was great about *these* holidays, though, is that I really feel we did not lose them, as time together and as downtime. I had to push it pretty hard over Easter - I did 43 hours in 5 days, and that's with losing most of Good Friday to social things and Easter Sunday morning to egg hunts and services - but the prize for doing so was some very nice quality time with the kids in the week following, and the ability to comfortably integrate the work after that into times when the kids were sleeping, at grandparents, playing together or reading.
I don't know what will happen for me work-wise after the conclusion of one of my current projects in May, when I start to actively source new work; but whatever way it goes, I hope I can manage the term 2 break as effectively as this one.
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
Living today, one eye on tomorrow
One of the things about being a freelancer is that it's a life is that trades off stability and certainty for flexibility and independence. Not many salaried people get to just take 6 weeks off over summer to spend with their kids and recharge their batteries - but I could, because I ruled off my job book and didn't take on new projects in that time. Not many salaried people, working fulltime or close to fulltime hours, get to be there for school and kinder pick up almost every day, and fit in short daytime volunteering tasks at school, kinder and in the community, but I do - I can opt to use an hour at midday doing these things and just pick up the time later in the evening. All of this is great and lovely, and one of the primary attractions for me of contracting.
However, the flipside is that as a freelancer, your income and work-life pattern is only as good as the next job - and you never really know when, or what, the next job will be. (And many freelancers, myself included, suffer from the conviction that every job you get will be THE LAST JOB EVAH, despite any evidence to the contrary). If you are, like me, a sole trader, without business partners to push work out to, and with many family responsibilities, this is also complicated by the fact that you need to be careful not to take on too much at any given time, otherwise you are at risk of not delivering (which is very bad) or really burning out (a fate I escaped by a whisker last year, in fact). So while you need to start thinking about the next job/s while completing the current job/s, it's also important not to jump too early and start quoting or or accepting work while heavy-duty projects are still in full swing, especially very time sensitive ones.
It's a fiendish balance to try and strike - keeping one hand in tomorrow while still giving today all of your energy - and I think it's the freelancing skill that is coming hardest to me. I have quoting, reporting, liaison, project managing, billing and delivery fairly well sorted now, but I still struggle to intuit the right moment to start looking for, or saying yes to, new work. I have to keep reminding myself to build in not just my work commitments but periods of peak demand with family things (ie C's 4th birthday is coming up later this month, and the time required for party planning, food preparation and logistics has to be factored into my calculations about available working time).
On the other hand, I think it's good for me in a lot of ways. I am such a risk averse person - cautious +++, as one of my high school teachers fairly described me once - and the absence of certainty about my work future past the end of my current booked jobs in early May is both challenging me and also growing my capacity to deal equably with change, risk and variation. Learning to cast my line into tomorrow without knowing what I'm going to catch is quite invigorating, and teaches me skills I can use in the chaotic system that is family life (where every day is a box of chocolates ... you never know what you're gonna get).
It's funny - I never expected to embrace uncertainty, but here I am, pointing it sunny side up, as I continue in my freelancing life.
However, the flipside is that as a freelancer, your income and work-life pattern is only as good as the next job - and you never really know when, or what, the next job will be. (And many freelancers, myself included, suffer from the conviction that every job you get will be THE LAST JOB EVAH, despite any evidence to the contrary). If you are, like me, a sole trader, without business partners to push work out to, and with many family responsibilities, this is also complicated by the fact that you need to be careful not to take on too much at any given time, otherwise you are at risk of not delivering (which is very bad) or really burning out (a fate I escaped by a whisker last year, in fact). So while you need to start thinking about the next job/s while completing the current job/s, it's also important not to jump too early and start quoting or or accepting work while heavy-duty projects are still in full swing, especially very time sensitive ones.
It's a fiendish balance to try and strike - keeping one hand in tomorrow while still giving today all of your energy - and I think it's the freelancing skill that is coming hardest to me. I have quoting, reporting, liaison, project managing, billing and delivery fairly well sorted now, but I still struggle to intuit the right moment to start looking for, or saying yes to, new work. I have to keep reminding myself to build in not just my work commitments but periods of peak demand with family things (ie C's 4th birthday is coming up later this month, and the time required for party planning, food preparation and logistics has to be factored into my calculations about available working time).
On the other hand, I think it's good for me in a lot of ways. I am such a risk averse person - cautious +++, as one of my high school teachers fairly described me once - and the absence of certainty about my work future past the end of my current booked jobs in early May is both challenging me and also growing my capacity to deal equably with change, risk and variation. Learning to cast my line into tomorrow without knowing what I'm going to catch is quite invigorating, and teaches me skills I can use in the chaotic system that is family life (where every day is a box of chocolates ... you never know what you're gonna get).
It's funny - I never expected to embrace uncertainty, but here I am, pointing it sunny side up, as I continue in my freelancing life.
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
Self-employed and working at home with kids: A blog mini series - Profile 3: Tony of Between Coffees Web Design (Part 2)
(This is part 2 of Tony's reflections on life as an at-home worker and primary caregiver for kids).
The boundary is also blurred in that because I am at home it often falls upon me to organize (not necessarily cook) what’s for dinner, do the shopping that may need to be done, do and hang out the washing, try and get the kitchen clean, floors swept etc. I sometimes resent the totally unfounded assumption that just because I’m at home my work can be put on hold to do this, but this is generally only on bad days. It’s common sense. I’m here, the jobs need to be done. It’s a matter of making things fit.
I’ll still do some work on the weekend if I have to, my wife will often take the kids out for the morning or afternoon to give me peace and quiet. This is one way I manage peak workloads. I have also found that outsourcing some of the basic work is an option for me. It takes a few tries to find contractors of a suitable quality but they have come in handy. Apart from this it really is a matter of trying to manufacture time; emails or calls can be responded to while waiting for the school pick up, plans for the next day are made the night before, accepting the house will look like a bomb site for another day.
Even with these measures there are times when work butts up against family demands, especially now with the two eldest involved in out of school work or activities. It’s a mix of which demand wins. P has to be at work to start on time and there’s no way there but via car. However sometimes I’ve missed afternoon coffees with friends or outings with the family because a client has a deadline that cannot be moved. I would love to be able to say family always comes first but any working parent will tell you this just isn’t possible. I believe though that working from home has given me far greater opportunity to be involved with the kids and that so far I have to accept I’ve done the best I can with juggling work/family demands.
I’ve mentioned before that my partner helps a lot on the weekend if I need more work time but as she works office hours during the week it really is up to me when it comes to child activity tasks during the week. Anything from dropping off forgotten lunches to making sure P is at work at time. I know she would like to be more involved and she envies me to a certain extent. I also know that whenever I need her help it’s there, all I have to do is ask. I don’t think I could run my business without her support, not unless the kids could be locked in a cupboard when not at school.
We don’t have much family close, mine is in the country and my partner has just her mum and brother nearby. That being said, my mother in law has been a godsend. Not only does her Thursday help give me a free day to work she has stepped in at other times when I couldn’t plan meetings or trips around other care. I don’t like to ask her for help, she has a busy enough life as it is, but knowing there is that back up in case of emergencies makes work so much easier. I don’t use any community resources as such, although I am looking at building a network of workers who work from home so that may change in the near future.
The biggest advantages from working at home when you have children for me is undoubtedly the time I have been able to spend with them. I’ve been able to watch them grow up, able to be there on their first day of school, been able to take them on trips to the zoo, got to know that H doesn’t like fish and K takes an eternity to eat lunch and that A won’t, for love or money, eat green apples put in his lunch box. This is priceless and I can now see why my old boss told me he envied what I was going to do.
Disadvantages though are the restrictions on time. This, hopefully, won’t be such an issue with all kids at school next year but the constant juggling of work and kids demands can be draining. Understanding clients will, in the end, only understand so far and being self-employed you can’t afford to disappoint clients. I should make it clear I’ve never resented having the kids at home, just some days it would have been a lot happier for everyone if Mary Poppins had have blown in on the hot northerlies that hit our back door.
The kids have never directly expressed frustration at me having to work, I’d like to think it’s because I’ve explained to them in ways they can understand that dad has to work sometimes. I think it’s more likely that we have three who are happy to play together and that twins have someone else to play with when A is at school. I’ve seen disappointment in their eyes when I tell them I’ll look at their latest Lego creation, or come shop at their toy store, and it hits hard. I always try to make sure I follow up when I say ‘in a minute’, I just hope that in the future they remember I did turn up. If I’m not flat out I will stop and have a chat, look at what they have to show me and I can see they love this.
If you’re considering working at home with kids what would I suggest? Well, the following have worked for me.
Thank you so much, Tony, for sharing your wisdom! Next week, the final profile in this series - I'm interrogating my own self this time :-)
The boundary is also blurred in that because I am at home it often falls upon me to organize (not necessarily cook) what’s for dinner, do the shopping that may need to be done, do and hang out the washing, try and get the kitchen clean, floors swept etc. I sometimes resent the totally unfounded assumption that just because I’m at home my work can be put on hold to do this, but this is generally only on bad days. It’s common sense. I’m here, the jobs need to be done. It’s a matter of making things fit.
I’ll still do some work on the weekend if I have to, my wife will often take the kids out for the morning or afternoon to give me peace and quiet. This is one way I manage peak workloads. I have also found that outsourcing some of the basic work is an option for me. It takes a few tries to find contractors of a suitable quality but they have come in handy. Apart from this it really is a matter of trying to manufacture time; emails or calls can be responded to while waiting for the school pick up, plans for the next day are made the night before, accepting the house will look like a bomb site for another day.
Even with these measures there are times when work butts up against family demands, especially now with the two eldest involved in out of school work or activities. It’s a mix of which demand wins. P has to be at work to start on time and there’s no way there but via car. However sometimes I’ve missed afternoon coffees with friends or outings with the family because a client has a deadline that cannot be moved. I would love to be able to say family always comes first but any working parent will tell you this just isn’t possible. I believe though that working from home has given me far greater opportunity to be involved with the kids and that so far I have to accept I’ve done the best I can with juggling work/family demands.
I’ve mentioned before that my partner helps a lot on the weekend if I need more work time but as she works office hours during the week it really is up to me when it comes to child activity tasks during the week. Anything from dropping off forgotten lunches to making sure P is at work at time. I know she would like to be more involved and she envies me to a certain extent. I also know that whenever I need her help it’s there, all I have to do is ask. I don’t think I could run my business without her support, not unless the kids could be locked in a cupboard when not at school.
We don’t have much family close, mine is in the country and my partner has just her mum and brother nearby. That being said, my mother in law has been a godsend. Not only does her Thursday help give me a free day to work she has stepped in at other times when I couldn’t plan meetings or trips around other care. I don’t like to ask her for help, she has a busy enough life as it is, but knowing there is that back up in case of emergencies makes work so much easier. I don’t use any community resources as such, although I am looking at building a network of workers who work from home so that may change in the near future.
The biggest advantages from working at home when you have children for me is undoubtedly the time I have been able to spend with them. I’ve been able to watch them grow up, able to be there on their first day of school, been able to take them on trips to the zoo, got to know that H doesn’t like fish and K takes an eternity to eat lunch and that A won’t, for love or money, eat green apples put in his lunch box. This is priceless and I can now see why my old boss told me he envied what I was going to do.
Disadvantages though are the restrictions on time. This, hopefully, won’t be such an issue with all kids at school next year but the constant juggling of work and kids demands can be draining. Understanding clients will, in the end, only understand so far and being self-employed you can’t afford to disappoint clients. I should make it clear I’ve never resented having the kids at home, just some days it would have been a lot happier for everyone if Mary Poppins had have blown in on the hot northerlies that hit our back door.
The kids have never directly expressed frustration at me having to work, I’d like to think it’s because I’ve explained to them in ways they can understand that dad has to work sometimes. I think it’s more likely that we have three who are happy to play together and that twins have someone else to play with when A is at school. I’ve seen disappointment in their eyes when I tell them I’ll look at their latest Lego creation, or come shop at their toy store, and it hits hard. I always try to make sure I follow up when I say ‘in a minute’, I just hope that in the future they remember I did turn up. If I’m not flat out I will stop and have a chat, look at what they have to show me and I can see they love this.
If you’re considering working at home with kids what would I suggest? Well, the following have worked for me.
- Make sure you have a space that can be shut off from the world. You’ll need it.
- If you can, set up a regular time where you won’t need to be looking after the kids. You will need to make long calls, go see people, or just concentrate like mad. The expense of paying for someone to help is worth it in the end.
- Talk to your clients. Let them know you have kids, let them know if you won’t be available at school pick up time. If they don’t understand then you probably don’t want to work with them.
- Talk to your wife/husband/partner when you need help. Kathy has pointed out every self-employed person will get snowed under at times and you will need someone’s support.
- If you can, try and switch off after a given time. I’d love to be able to do this but, for me, it just doesn’t work.
- Get a separate phone for business. Every freelancer will have a story of the phone going off at stupid o’clock.
- For me the ages of 2-4 were the toughest, but it was only two years. I kept my biggest clients happy and held on. So far, so good.
- Above all don’t hesitate to ask for help when you need it. It will be better for you and for your kids.
Thank you so much, Tony, for sharing your wisdom! Next week, the final profile in this series - I'm interrogating my own self this time :-)
Monday, December 3, 2012
Self-employed and working at home with kids: A blog mini series - Profile 3: Tony from Between Coffees Web Design (Part 1)
Welcome to the third profile on my mini series on people who are managing the working at home while being a primary caregiver juggle. Today I'm featuring web designer Tony, who can also be found at his own blog, Between Coffees.
Today is part 1 of Tony's reflections on combining these roles; part 2 will be published tomorrow. So without further ado ... introducing Tony Malloy, web designer, dad and all-round good guy.
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I guess it's best to start with the reason I work from home. I'm a dad of four. There's P, our teenager, A our seven year old and the twins (K and H) who are five. When A came along we managed my working away from home thanks to a lucky combination of long service entitlements and my wife’s convenient work based child care. However, by the time the twins came along we had to make a decision. Work to pay for child care or one of us stay home.
I am a web developer so thankfully I have skills that translate well to working from home. I had also been slowly working up my business in my own time for a few years so I wouldn't have to start from scratch. I still had some long service leave left so after taking that I officially stopped working for The Man and started out on my own. No more calling clients on my lunch hour and racing home to deal with any problems.
I work 99.9% of my time for home. Leaving paid work conincided with building our own house and one of the items on the must-have list was an office for me. I now spend most of the day in my office, overlooking the comings and goings in our street. Any meetings, and they are rare as most of my contact is via email then to a lesser extent phone or Skype, are held in cafes dotted around town. When I first started out this was viewed as a novelty but I don't think anyone has commented on meeting for a coffee to do work for years now.
One of the changes we made to the plan of our house was to include doors on what was an open office. You can't work if the kids can wander in and out, it's simply impossible. The kids know that if dad's door is shut he's working and not to be disturbed, although this doesn't work all the time. Sometimes I just have to be told about the Lego construction underway, or that K called A a pea-brain.
I have a nanny come in two days a week (two different nannies, both named Rita, so one is Old Rita who has been with us for five years, the other new Rita who has been with us three) for four hours each so I can sit down and get work done in uninterrupted blocks. This has been in place since I started working. The other saviour has been Nana who hail, rain or shine has taken the kids on a Thursday since they were babies which has given me a whole day to arrange meetings or work.
Up until this year this meant I had two full days with K and H, Mr A being at school. I look back on these days and wonder if I could have managed my time better. Some days work would have to be done and they wouldn't get my full attention which always left me flustered. To this day I still feel bad when I hear one of the say "no, dad has to work so he won't be coming". Now the twins are in kinder and heading off to school next year this won’t be so much of a problem, I will have five days a week from 9 to 3 that I will be able to plan out.
I never considered putting the kids in to child care outside of the home. Cost was a major factor but I always liked the idea of having them here with me and paying someone to care for them here was my first preference.
As the kids have grown older I have found it easier to work with them around. They are reasonably self-sufficient and the three younger ones form a tight unit that can generally find some way to fill their time. They’ve learned that when dad says he’s making a phone call they need to be quiet and that sometimes they will have to wait a couple of minutes if I’m finishing something off. When they were younger it was much more of a struggle – we all know you can’t reason with kids. I found that letting my clients know I worked from home and had small children helped. Not one client ever made an issue of it and just this week one apologised for forgetting it was school pick up. Communication is the key here.
The trouble I have is working when other adults may be visiting. This doesn’t happen very often but I feel I’m being a poor host if I have to excuse myself to go and work. The better I know the visitor the easier it is though. Attitudes to working at home seem to have changed over the years and it’s no longer regarded as ‘being at home with a bit of work done every now and then’. Most understand I am working, it’s just I don’t have to commute to my office.
My biggest struggle though is drawing a boundary between work and family life. I am a workalholic and have the fear that every business owner/freelancer has that this job may be the last I ever get so I work hard to deliver. I find it hard to switch off, my mind is constantly thinking of solutions to problems or prioritising projects. Recently I tried to turn off my computer at 5.30 but this didn’t work for me. I find an extra hour or so in the evening makes me feel better, but it means that’s an hour I’m not spending time with the kids or my partner.
I don’t know a solution for this; how does one overcome ones built in drives? If anyone as the answers…. In the meantime I have made one concession and no longer answer work calls on the weekend or in the evening. One hint to those starting out working from home is to get a second phone number. I made the mistake of using my personal mobile when starting out. A rookie mistake, but a big one.
Tomorrow - part 2 of Tony's insights on how to manage the juggle.
Today is part 1 of Tony's reflections on combining these roles; part 2 will be published tomorrow. So without further ado ... introducing Tony Malloy, web designer, dad and all-round good guy.
----------------------------
I guess it's best to start with the reason I work from home. I'm a dad of four. There's P, our teenager, A our seven year old and the twins (K and H) who are five. When A came along we managed my working away from home thanks to a lucky combination of long service entitlements and my wife’s convenient work based child care. However, by the time the twins came along we had to make a decision. Work to pay for child care or one of us stay home.
I am a web developer so thankfully I have skills that translate well to working from home. I had also been slowly working up my business in my own time for a few years so I wouldn't have to start from scratch. I still had some long service leave left so after taking that I officially stopped working for The Man and started out on my own. No more calling clients on my lunch hour and racing home to deal with any problems.
I work 99.9% of my time for home. Leaving paid work conincided with building our own house and one of the items on the must-have list was an office for me. I now spend most of the day in my office, overlooking the comings and goings in our street. Any meetings, and they are rare as most of my contact is via email then to a lesser extent phone or Skype, are held in cafes dotted around town. When I first started out this was viewed as a novelty but I don't think anyone has commented on meeting for a coffee to do work for years now.
One of the changes we made to the plan of our house was to include doors on what was an open office. You can't work if the kids can wander in and out, it's simply impossible. The kids know that if dad's door is shut he's working and not to be disturbed, although this doesn't work all the time. Sometimes I just have to be told about the Lego construction underway, or that K called A a pea-brain.
I have a nanny come in two days a week (two different nannies, both named Rita, so one is Old Rita who has been with us for five years, the other new Rita who has been with us three) for four hours each so I can sit down and get work done in uninterrupted blocks. This has been in place since I started working. The other saviour has been Nana who hail, rain or shine has taken the kids on a Thursday since they were babies which has given me a whole day to arrange meetings or work.
Up until this year this meant I had two full days with K and H, Mr A being at school. I look back on these days and wonder if I could have managed my time better. Some days work would have to be done and they wouldn't get my full attention which always left me flustered. To this day I still feel bad when I hear one of the say "no, dad has to work so he won't be coming". Now the twins are in kinder and heading off to school next year this won’t be so much of a problem, I will have five days a week from 9 to 3 that I will be able to plan out.
I never considered putting the kids in to child care outside of the home. Cost was a major factor but I always liked the idea of having them here with me and paying someone to care for them here was my first preference.
As the kids have grown older I have found it easier to work with them around. They are reasonably self-sufficient and the three younger ones form a tight unit that can generally find some way to fill their time. They’ve learned that when dad says he’s making a phone call they need to be quiet and that sometimes they will have to wait a couple of minutes if I’m finishing something off. When they were younger it was much more of a struggle – we all know you can’t reason with kids. I found that letting my clients know I worked from home and had small children helped. Not one client ever made an issue of it and just this week one apologised for forgetting it was school pick up. Communication is the key here.
The trouble I have is working when other adults may be visiting. This doesn’t happen very often but I feel I’m being a poor host if I have to excuse myself to go and work. The better I know the visitor the easier it is though. Attitudes to working at home seem to have changed over the years and it’s no longer regarded as ‘being at home with a bit of work done every now and then’. Most understand I am working, it’s just I don’t have to commute to my office.
My biggest struggle though is drawing a boundary between work and family life. I am a workalholic and have the fear that every business owner/freelancer has that this job may be the last I ever get so I work hard to deliver. I find it hard to switch off, my mind is constantly thinking of solutions to problems or prioritising projects. Recently I tried to turn off my computer at 5.30 but this didn’t work for me. I find an extra hour or so in the evening makes me feel better, but it means that’s an hour I’m not spending time with the kids or my partner.
I don’t know a solution for this; how does one overcome ones built in drives? If anyone as the answers…. In the meantime I have made one concession and no longer answer work calls on the weekend or in the evening. One hint to those starting out working from home is to get a second phone number. I made the mistake of using my personal mobile when starting out. A rookie mistake, but a big one.
Tomorrow - part 2 of Tony's insights on how to manage the juggle.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Self-employed and working at home with kids: A blog mini series - Profile 2: Tania the photographer (Part 2)
This is the second part of my profile on Tania, a wonderful photographer (and great person!) and how she manages her working and home lives.
9. How much do you rely on your partner to pick up household and child-activity tasks when you are busy with work?
My husband is out of the house for 12 hours everyday. We did compromise over 18 months ago for him to work from home once a fortnight on a Friday. It was mainly because I felt that he was too stressed, and needed to at least have a shorter day at home. He really doesn’t have a shorter day at home, but I think not having to be in the traffic for that one day, and working in the home environment has helped.
I don’t overly rely on him to do much for me, to be honest I rely more on my friends. There has been the odd occasion he has taken the children to work with him for the day if they are unwell. Its a small office environment where he is and his boss loves kids and is pretty alright about it. Its the same deal though, its something you only do if you really have no other choice. If I am desperate or starting extra early I have asked him to work from home and go in a little later, but again its probably only been twice in the past year.
I rely greatly on my husband as my IT man. Without his great computer knowledge. I wouldn't have such an efficient system running, and backing up all my work. There have been times that he has really saved my butt.
The other thing is that he does all of my accounts. He is great with all that sort of stuff and without him I don't think that I would have such a effective business running.
So although, I may not rely on him heavily for his hands on with juggling the kids as such, I couldn't work as well without his great skills to help run my business, so I think he more than gives his share of the household in many other ways and that I am grateful for.
10. How does your partner feel about this?
As long as he can fit something in he’s fine. I really organise all of the pick ups, drop offs, activities. It just seems easier and less stressful than having to run everything by him, when it rarely involves him.
11. How much do you rely on family, friends and community for help when work is busy? Are you able to reciprocate this help in other ways?
I rely on friends for a school pick up generally. I am usually no longer than half an hour out from pick up but it can be a real squeeze to get there on time. I ask, and I do reciprocate the offer, particularly in November and December and whereever else in between I can. I like to make sure that it is an even balance. I think we are all of the same opinion, so it works well. I often call them if I am running close to pick up and just ask if they wouldn't mind keeping an eye out for the boys, but generally I get there in time, but it good to atleast have someone there looking out for them.
12. What do you see as the biggest advantages of working at home when you have children?
I have always wanted to pick up my children from school. I want to know how they are feeling and how their day has been and I think you get one of the best looks at that when they see you after school, and you get the big smile, or a question or they tell you something. I think that's a great advantage. My kids get to see me work a lot. So they know that I am a working Mum but I do have plenty of time to listen to them as well. I like that they see all of that. They see the juggle and that they sometimes see the stress. Its all part of teaching them about working in society.
13. What are the biggest disadvantages?
The biggest disadvantage is that no-one actually thinks you work, when you are working from home. I think most parents at school seem to think that because i can drop off and pick up my kids and don't work for a company, just myself that its pretend. I recently volunteered to help type up some books at school the kids were working on. I set aside a Monday morning. When I went in to check on it, the teacher was saying oh yes well I know that this other Mum is taking a day off work to come in and help so I can't change her schedule because its very generous for her to take the day off work. (I knew who she was talking about. A good friend actually who works part-time but has an important job I suppose you could say) It was actually a day off for her, but I was a little frazzled because I can be flexible that its not considered that I've taken time off, its more I just have some pretend work to do that the fairies do. Aaaaaaaghggghghg!
14. How do your children feel about your work? Do they ever express frustration with the limitations it may place on your time?
The children have sometimes been a bit impatient with my work, but that is usually if I have have to drive around with them to drop off work at a couple of different locations, but I always just negotiate if you help me with this then I will help you later. Thats all part of it, and to be honest I don't feel guilty about that. I think its a good thing for them to see and learn.
15. Finally: Top tips for others who might be thinking of going down this road?
When you have young children it is a perfect time to start contemplating a new career and working from home. Becoming a parent gives us a different perspective on life, and opens the door to new ideas, and beliefs in ourselves. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I don’t miss office politics, slow computers, and inefficiency. I feel very rewarded at the end of not all days, but quite a few days in a year when I am astounded at the amount of work I have gotten through in one day.
If you want to work from home allow your business to grow at the same pace your children are, as they get older and less physical demands are placed on you. Naps times are gone, time concentrate without interruption get longer, seize those times to then build up the business where you can. We don’t always have great control over this, but like anything just try to self manage as best you can.
Try to do everything locally so that you aren’t stretching yourself all across the city.
Never feel guilty about working. I have a number of friends who work from home, one day recently I was having a cuppa with one and I commented on how my husband thinks I am better when I am working, she turned around and said so does mine, and I know I am. I think I am a better mother and wife as well as of more sound mind. I’m sure some of you out there would understand that. Its a deep ingrained independence that is in me. And I love working.
Thank you so much Tania for sharing your insights with me. I appreciate the time you took and the wisdom of your answers!
Profile 3 in this blog mini series will be posted next Monday and Tuesday.
This is post 27 in NaBloPoMo. 27 down, 3 to go!
9. How much do you rely on your partner to pick up household and child-activity tasks when you are busy with work?
My husband is out of the house for 12 hours everyday. We did compromise over 18 months ago for him to work from home once a fortnight on a Friday. It was mainly because I felt that he was too stressed, and needed to at least have a shorter day at home. He really doesn’t have a shorter day at home, but I think not having to be in the traffic for that one day, and working in the home environment has helped.
I don’t overly rely on him to do much for me, to be honest I rely more on my friends. There has been the odd occasion he has taken the children to work with him for the day if they are unwell. Its a small office environment where he is and his boss loves kids and is pretty alright about it. Its the same deal though, its something you only do if you really have no other choice. If I am desperate or starting extra early I have asked him to work from home and go in a little later, but again its probably only been twice in the past year.
I rely greatly on my husband as my IT man. Without his great computer knowledge. I wouldn't have such an efficient system running, and backing up all my work. There have been times that he has really saved my butt.
The other thing is that he does all of my accounts. He is great with all that sort of stuff and without him I don't think that I would have such a effective business running.
So although, I may not rely on him heavily for his hands on with juggling the kids as such, I couldn't work as well without his great skills to help run my business, so I think he more than gives his share of the household in many other ways and that I am grateful for.
10. How does your partner feel about this?
As long as he can fit something in he’s fine. I really organise all of the pick ups, drop offs, activities. It just seems easier and less stressful than having to run everything by him, when it rarely involves him.
11. How much do you rely on family, friends and community for help when work is busy? Are you able to reciprocate this help in other ways?
I rely on friends for a school pick up generally. I am usually no longer than half an hour out from pick up but it can be a real squeeze to get there on time. I ask, and I do reciprocate the offer, particularly in November and December and whereever else in between I can. I like to make sure that it is an even balance. I think we are all of the same opinion, so it works well. I often call them if I am running close to pick up and just ask if they wouldn't mind keeping an eye out for the boys, but generally I get there in time, but it good to atleast have someone there looking out for them.
12. What do you see as the biggest advantages of working at home when you have children?
I have always wanted to pick up my children from school. I want to know how they are feeling and how their day has been and I think you get one of the best looks at that when they see you after school, and you get the big smile, or a question or they tell you something. I think that's a great advantage. My kids get to see me work a lot. So they know that I am a working Mum but I do have plenty of time to listen to them as well. I like that they see all of that. They see the juggle and that they sometimes see the stress. Its all part of teaching them about working in society.
13. What are the biggest disadvantages?
The biggest disadvantage is that no-one actually thinks you work, when you are working from home. I think most parents at school seem to think that because i can drop off and pick up my kids and don't work for a company, just myself that its pretend. I recently volunteered to help type up some books at school the kids were working on. I set aside a Monday morning. When I went in to check on it, the teacher was saying oh yes well I know that this other Mum is taking a day off work to come in and help so I can't change her schedule because its very generous for her to take the day off work. (I knew who she was talking about. A good friend actually who works part-time but has an important job I suppose you could say) It was actually a day off for her, but I was a little frazzled because I can be flexible that its not considered that I've taken time off, its more I just have some pretend work to do that the fairies do. Aaaaaaaghggghghg!
14. How do your children feel about your work? Do they ever express frustration with the limitations it may place on your time?
The children have sometimes been a bit impatient with my work, but that is usually if I have have to drive around with them to drop off work at a couple of different locations, but I always just negotiate if you help me with this then I will help you later. Thats all part of it, and to be honest I don't feel guilty about that. I think its a good thing for them to see and learn.
15. Finally: Top tips for others who might be thinking of going down this road?
When you have young children it is a perfect time to start contemplating a new career and working from home. Becoming a parent gives us a different perspective on life, and opens the door to new ideas, and beliefs in ourselves. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I don’t miss office politics, slow computers, and inefficiency. I feel very rewarded at the end of not all days, but quite a few days in a year when I am astounded at the amount of work I have gotten through in one day.
If you want to work from home allow your business to grow at the same pace your children are, as they get older and less physical demands are placed on you. Naps times are gone, time concentrate without interruption get longer, seize those times to then build up the business where you can. We don’t always have great control over this, but like anything just try to self manage as best you can.
Try to do everything locally so that you aren’t stretching yourself all across the city.
Never feel guilty about working. I have a number of friends who work from home, one day recently I was having a cuppa with one and I commented on how my husband thinks I am better when I am working, she turned around and said so does mine, and I know I am. I think I am a better mother and wife as well as of more sound mind. I’m sure some of you out there would understand that. Its a deep ingrained independence that is in me. And I love working.
Thank you so much Tania for sharing your insights with me. I appreciate the time you took and the wisdom of your answers!
Profile 3 in this blog mini series will be posted next Monday and Tuesday.
This is post 27 in NaBloPoMo. 27 down, 3 to go!
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